Alethia
by Eldr-Fire
Summary: Painful Secrets sequel. Spoilers for current arc & Kakashi Gaiden. Kakashi and Sakura haven't been getting along, and when their own relationships complicate things their fragile family breaks apart... Kinda AU HIATUS
1. Reflection

Drumroll, please...!

Ta-da! Didn't think it was going to happen, did you?

Yay! Sequel! Wasn't going to do one, but it was kind of expected, neh?

Relationships! It's what you wanted, isn't it? No SakuSasu, though. I'm sorry to say that that couple would be physically impossible in this story. Yes, I did it— I killed off Sasuke. And you don't even get to _watch_. How cruel is that? This story takes place post-time skip, after the current arc (assuming it's the last big action arc). Details will come in good time, but bottom line is he's dead and he's not coming back. Sorry 'bout that one. I didn't want him to dominate this story; I'm being very careful about what happens and how it happens. Nah, I've got other things in store for Sakura and Kakashi. No, not incest. Don't even go there. I'm going to try my best not to turn this into a romantic comedy; there'll still be healthy doses of angst, so no worries there. If you're unhappy with the pairings at the beginning, take consolation in the fact that they're not set in stone. Any concerns? Lemme know. Any questions? You can ask, but I may not answer. Rating is T for now, hopefully won't have to change.

Oh, and before anyone asks what "alethia" means-- it's Greek, and means something alone the lines of "sincerity", "truth"... Tsukiyomi the Kami gave me the idea to use it as the title. Enjoy!

* * *

_Rain drizzled softly around the Memorial Stone, the sound muffled by the long and swaying blades of grass. It raced to the edge of the Stone's flat surface, running down its face and swimming into the grooves that made up the names of fallen shinobi. There was a soft glow hovering over the dark treeline, the rest of the sky already painted with the purples and blues of night._

_Two people were sitting on top of the Stone, watching as the final remnants of the sun sunk past the canopy of trees. Their legs were dangling over the edge of the cold slab of stone, water dripping slowly off of their bare toes. On the right was a boy of around fifteen, a navy blue mask adorning his pale face. His mess of spiky silver hair flopped down to one side, falling over his mismatched eyes. He was still wearing the bloodstained, black and white uniform he had worn on his last mission, although the sandals, gloves, and dog mask had been removed and unceremoniously discarded nearby. He was loosely gripping the edge of the Stone with his right hand, while the fingers of his left were intertwined with those of the girl sitting beside him._

_She was wearing a simple purple dress, raindrops collecting on her long black eyelashes. She wore a peaceful expression on her face, her head tilted towards the right, towards the boy next to her. Her warm brown eyes were glittering with the subtle glow cast by the light of the stars that were slowly revealing themselves. Her Konoha headband was draped over the weathered edge of the Memorial Stone, her sandals neatly set at its foot; three pale lavender flowers, wilting already by being pelted with rain earlier that evening, accompanied them._

_The girl scooted slightly closer to the boy on her right, biting her lip slightly as she turned her wide brown orbs towards him. His eyes were closed; he was in a state of bliss, enjoying the feeling of the moist breeze tickling his eyelids. He could feel her warm breath on his face, and he cracked his eyes open in response._

"_Kakashi?" She whispered his name cautiously, as if she were afraid that she was going to blink and wake up from this dream. He seemed to be thinking along the same lines; his half-lidded eyes locked with her wide and vulnerable ones and he refused to let them close._

"_Do you think we're…" She unconsciously leaned forward as she spoke, the tip of her nose almost touching the cloth covering his. Kakashi didn't notice as he was pulled in towards her, too; both were completely wrapped up in the moment. "Do you think we could… stay together?"_

_Kakashi blinked, his eyes glossing over as he felt the tears start to well up. Not really aware of his own movements, he nodded his head slightly in affirmation, fumbling clumsily with his mask. Rin's fingers instinctively shot up towards his, guiding them as they pulled the mask down._

_They remained still for only another moment before their lips met, fitting each other perfectly as they kissed._

_At first it was clumsy, both of them uncertain, but then he cupped her chin in his hand and they cast their hesitancy aside, pouring their souls into that kiss. All of their emotions came spilling out, channeling themselves into the way he caressed her cheek, the way she gasped softly as he plunged in. Disregarding their surroundings, they lost themselves in a world of passion that they alone shared—_

Kakashi's train of thought was broken by the feeling of something wet trickling down the side of his face. He blinked, tilting his head towards the sky. He squinted, trying to keep the rain out of his eyes as he observed the storm clouds billowing ominously overhead. He figured that in less than five minutes the collected rain water would be swimming around his ankles. He sighed quietly, returning his gaze to the top of the Memorial Stone, weathered smooth by years of enduring Konoha's fickle weather. Both of his eyes were focused on the spot he had sat on, such a long time ago now… He could still almost feel her lips brushing up against his, her soft fingers slowly intertwining with his calloused ones.

His gaze slid downwards onto the names carved into the stone's surface; he felt his shoulders droop slightly as they fell on the name he had read too many times to count.

Her name. Rin's name.

_Rin._

He sighed again, cocking his head to the side as he felt his eyes mist over. _Dead at sixteen… Dead because I was too damn stupid to keep myself to myself… Dead because at fifteen I thought I knew everything. _He slowly exhaled a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. It was undeniable; at fifteen years of age, Hatake Kakashi had been a confused teenager who couldn't seem to understand what was going on inside his own mind and who still, after nine years of killing whenever and whomever he was told to, had no idea how the world worked.

Again he sighed, bitterly this time. He closed his eyes, feeling the rain dance lightly across his exposed face.

_As if I really have any idea now._

He stood in silence for a few moments before parting his lips to whisper to the cold breeze dragging the rain towards him. "I've missed you," he said quietly, his words colored with an aching sadness. He cracked his eyes open, resting them on a space a little bit above the top of the stone. "It's been awhile since I've been here; in between hospital visits, Tsunade has been keeping me busy with more understaffed and underranked missions than I've had since I quit ANBU." He narrowed his eyes. "I haven't been able to spend much time with Sakura because of it, let alone Naruto." He paused. "Naruto's still getting over Sasuke's death; I wish I could comfort him more, but I've hardly seen him since…" His voice trailed off as disconnected images swam in front of his eyes.

_Naruto running to the body and screaming through his tears as he shook the front of Sasuke's bloody yukata…_

_Sakura falling to her knees, shaking violently as she succumbed to her sobs…_

_Yamato standing behind her, head hung in sorrow…_

_Team 8 frozen with shock in the background, hardly able to stand…_

He shook his head back and forth vigorously, trying to rid his mind of such thoughts. _Don't think about that now, _he told himself forcefully. _Don't think about it _period.

He blinked several times in quick succession, trying to clear his vision of the faded images as if they were half-forgotten nightmares attempting to come back for another round. He cleared his throat, inhaling slowly before speaking again.

"It's hard to believe that it's been fifteen years," he said quietly. "So much has happened since…" His words faded as he was again unwillingly overwhelmed by memories.

_Rin's tangled brown hair plastered to her sweat-drenched face as she inhaled sharply, her eyelashes fluttering wildly in pleasure…_

_Two teenagers lying asleep on the couch, the girl wrapped in the boy's arms as sunshine crept through the window…_

_Harsh words ringing in his ears as he clamped his shaking hands over them, trying to block out her screams as she sobbed into his chest…_

_Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, dark thoughts racing through his mind as he eyed the sharp razor on the side of the sink…_

Kakashi clenched his eyes shut, trying to block out the images. After several moments, he opened them again. He swallowed before continuing to talk. "As I said, I haven't been able to spend much time with Sakura."

He paused.

"I think… For the most part, I think she's forgiven us."

Another pause.

"Although I'm not sure if she ever held anything against you; after all, it wasn't your… wasn't necessarily your fault." His brow furrowed. "She's recovered from Sasuke's death much more quickly and successfully than I had anticipated. She still…" He swallowed again. "She still cries for him sometimes, but that's… only to be expected… Actually, she's been doing fairly well recently." Both of his eyes curved into a smile. "She's managed to find herself a boyfriend. You may remember Nara Shikaku? He's got a son, and he's about as clueless as Shikaku and a genius to boot." He sighed exasperatedly, shoving his hands further into his pockets and turning his gaze upwards again. "I can't help but worry, though… I mean, I know that you and I were a pretty rare case, but… I'm just afraid that… afraid that Sakura will be hurt in the same way you were…"

There was silence before he continued. "Of course, Shikamaru's very responsible… Much more responsible than I was at that age." He allowed himself an embittered sigh before returning his gaze to the Memorial Stone.

"Well, speaking of Sakura… I haven't seen her in over a week, so I think I'll be heading home now." He raised a hand in salute. "Ja ne!" he said cheerfully before disappearing in a poof of smoke accompanied by a flurry of dancing leaves.

* * *

_The sounds of the busy street outside were muffled to a dull buzz of unimportant noise, insignificant compared to the important matters being discussed behind the tattered flaps of cloth fluttering lazily in the soft breeze. Three people on the cusp of adolescence sat on short black stools in front of the long booth of the Ichiraku Ramen Stand, the dim lighting casting shadows dancing across their faces. One, a blonde-haired boy, was slurping his ramen more enthusiastically than should have been allowed as he winked suggestively at the pretty brown-haired girl chopping vegetables behind the counter. She paid him no notice, instead eyeing the raven-haired boy sitting to the blonde's left. Said boy was frowning at the steaming bowl in front of him, trying to ignore the glances a pink-haired girl on the far right was constantly shooting him._

"_So, Sakura," the blonde said thickly, his mouth forming a little "o" as he sucked in a stray noodle, not bothering to wipe the broth from his chin. "What's it like living with the big man?"_

"_Stop calling him that," the black-haired boy spat. This earned him a finger waving obscenely in front of his face for a few seconds before the blonde returned to his precious ramen._

"_Whatever," the blonde muttered. "Anyways, like I was _saying_, does he actually, like, talk to you?"_

"_Of course he talks to me, Naruto," Sakura scoffed, her chopsticks dangling idly from her fingers. "Why wouldn't he?"_

_Naruto shrugged. "Sensei's just never been much of the talkative type, I guess." He sat up straighter, clasping his hands together._

"_Another, please!" he said loudly, grinning as the old man handed him yet another bowl. Naruto leaned over it eagerly, saying "Itadakimasu!" for what must have been the fifth time that evening._

"_Anyway," the dark-haired boy said, trying to tune out the disturbing noises coming from his right side, "Wasn't he supposed to treat us?"_

_Sakura sighed irritably. "Yeah, but as always, he skipped out to go visit—" With a little yelp of realization, she gulped back her words before she said too much._

"_Go where?" Naruto asked, his eyes wide as he peaked interestedly over his ramen bowl. "Visit who?"_

_Sakura shook her head back and forth sharply. "Nothing, nowhere, no one," she said hurriedly. Quickly changing the subject, she said, "A-Anyways, Sasuke, I was wondering if—"_

"_I already came out for ramen," Sasuke muttered darkly. "Isn't that enough?"_

_Sakura's eye nearly twitched as her gaze slid down from his face onto her untouched bowl of ramen. "Yeah," she murmured. Naruto, however, perked up immediately. "Oi, Sakura, _I _wouldn't mind—"_

"_Forget it."_

_Sakura's tone was gloomy but dangerously final; Naruto didn't dare challenge her words this time around. After all, what's more dangerous than someone who's got nothing to lose?_

_The brown-haired girl server leaned across the counter, smiling pleasantly. "How's the food?" she asked cheerfully. Naruto's smile spread from ear to ear as he grinned slyly at her, his blue eyes slits as he focused on the open neck of her uniform._

"_Beautiful," he muttered, a blush rising in his face as his nose grew unusually warm. The owner's daughter cocked an eyebrow immediately, the confused and suspicious look she wore quickly turning to an angry and embarrassed one as she raised her hand to slap Naruto. Her father's ringing call of, "Customer, customer!" stayed her open palm, which she instead slammed down onto the countertop._

"_Consider that a warning, chikan," she growled, flames practically jumping out of her narrowed brown eyes. She watched him cower in fear for a few seconds before twisting her scowl into a cheery grin, saying, "I hope you enjoy the rest of your meal." She then turned away sharply, and despite the circumstances, Naruto couldn't help but follow the swaying movements of her hips with his eyes._

"_Pervert," Sakura muttered under her breath, noticing that Naruto's nose was starting to look awful runny all of a sudden. "You're just as bad as Kakashi-sensei. Jiraiya-san, even."_

_Naruto tugged at his own cheeks, waggling his tongue at Sakura offensively. His eyes popped open and his hands fell, however, as a brilliant idea dawned on him._

"_Sakura! We should totally hook up Kakashi-sensei with Ayame!"_

_Sakura and Sasuke both nearly choked on their ramen._

"_Baka!" Sakura roared at once, turning to Naruto and bopping him on the head with her fist._

"_What, what?" Naruto whined, his hands covering his mop of golden hair protectively as he pushed his bottom lip out in a pouting fashion. "What did I—?"_

"_You never know when he's listening," Sasuke hissed. "He could be anywhere—"_

"… _Listening to everything you say." A shadow loomed over the three teenagers as they froze, rigid in their seats. All of them were thinking the same thing..._

Dammit!

_Kakashi slapped some crumpled-up bills onto the table. "This should be enough," he said, the false cheer in his voice sending shivers down the spines of his subordinates. He smiled at the furiously blushing Ayame, saying, "You can keep the change." He then placed his hands on Naruto's and Sasuke's shoulders. "Now, my little matchmakers, I think it's very important that we make a few things clear…"_

_Sakura couldn't help but grin devilishly as she watched the two boys she considered brothers listen to their sensei tell them exactly why such an arrangement wouldn't work out, and why they would be better off not trying for their own sakes. _He seems to have given this pairing a bit of thought, _Sakura commented privately, trying to suppress her grin. Kakashi left Naruto and Sasuke sitting quietly in their respective seats, heads bowed over their ramen humbly. She couldn't help but giggle at the scandalized looks on their faces and the deep red hue of Ayame's._

Sakura's reminiscing was interrupted by the sensation of something wet falling onto her shoulder. She looked upwards, searching for the source of the water. A storm seemed to have just narrowly skirted Konoha, leaving light rain in its wake. It had petered down to a slow drizzle; Sakura had been hit with a stray droplet, its downward path swayed by a sudden gust of wind. She sighed, returning to her cup of tea. It had now gone quite cold and was a dark greenish color with a clump of tea leaves sitting at the bottom. She swirled its contents around idly with a chopstick as she found herself straining her ears for echoes of her teammates' laughter. It seemed so long ago that they had all sat beside each other, still balancing precariously on the thin line that separated innocence from the life of a full-fledged shinobi. Naruto had laughed so openly then… and Sasuke had still been capable of showing enough emotion to blush… to feel remorse… to show fear…

Sakura sighed again, turning her head slightly to the left. Her gaze settled on the faded red cushion Sasuke had once sat on. She was dimly aware of the tears welling up behind her emerald eyes, although at this point, she hardly noticed nor cared. Tears at seemingly random moments were commonplace these days; sometimes she would be walking with Naruto and they would be talking about something simple like how the weather had been lately and without any warning Naruto would slow down, fists clenched as he doubled over with sobs.

"_Weren't we good enough for him?"_

Sakura's grip on her chipped cup tightened dangerously. _Don't think about it don't think about it don't think about it—_

"_We couldn't even kill Itachi, we couldn't even avenge his stupid death!"_

_Don't think about it don't think about it don't think about it—_

"_We could've stopped him!"_

_Don't think about it don't think about it don't think about it—_

"_We could have _saved_ him!"_

Saved.

Could have saved him.

_Saved him._

Could they have? They arrived as quickly as they could— after barely surviving their battles with Karin and Juugo and Kabuto, Sakura had privately thought — in hindsight, at least — that it was a miracle they had gotten there at all. And if they _had _reached Sasuke before Itachi delivered the final blow, could they have stopped him?

Would they have stopped him?

It had been a final battle between brothers whose relationship had been tainted with a hatred that could not be erased by time; Itachi had underestimated just how far Sasuke had gone to prepare for their final showdown, and he had paid for it with his life, even if he had taken Sasuke with him.

_It was almost a fitting end, really._

Sakura _almost_ regretted thinking that. She had poured her soul into finding him, into redeeming him, into returning his ambiguous "Thank you" with a good slap in the face followed by a warm bear hug. When they had stumbled across the carnage surrounding his bloody corpse, however, she had felt the part of her that still hung onto the hope that Sasuke wasn't too far gone irreversibly sever itself. She had cared, oh yes, and she had cried as she had never cried before (understanding for the first time in her life just how much losing Rin must've hurt Kakashi and why he had cried himself hoarse countless times for her), but after the ironically sunny funeral, she found herself unable to keep caring. It still tore her heart to look at a picture of him, still made her heart twinge whenever she happened to hear his name, but her heart had ultimately moved on and she knew that there was no going back.

She sighed again, gulping down the rest of her now lukewarm tea. Steaming to warm to cold to lukewarm and bitter all the while… a most distasteful sequence of events, in Sakura's opinion. She watched the old man, still determined to work at the Ramen Stand until his dying day, scrub mechanically at the wooden countertop. It was nice to have something monotonous distract her from the chaos of the shinobi world; she spent more time out of Konoha than in it these days, even if she was theoretically supposed to be stationed at the hospital. Her lip twitched, threatening to frown, but even the inconsistency in the system didn't seem enough to stir her emotions anymore.

In fact, there were now few things that did. Her relationship with Naruto had almost completely patched itself up again, even if there were those empty moments when both of them were craving a third presence, and those quiet moments when both of them could almost feel it.

Sakura really had to wipe the tears away this time. Rubbing her eyes with the heel of her hand, she willed the salty water to stay put long enough for her to get out of there. _Of all places, honestly…_

As far as comfort was concerned, Sakura knew there were people waiting to open their arms and their hearts to her, but for the most part she flew solo, not wanting others to have to carry the burden of the dull sadness she was carrying. Naruto was one thing, but the fourth member of their team…

Sakura hadn't been able to spend as much time with her father as she would've liked over the past three years. They had gotten to know each other fairly well; they would always visit Rin's grave together on her birthday and on Sakura's. It was at those two times of the year that Sakura felt a real connection between the two of them. Rain or shine, they would both wake up, eat, shower, and dress before hopping out of the window and making their way to the Memorial Stone together. She would snake her fingers through his and they would stand there, side by side; sometimes in silence, sometimes talking to Rin. Try as he might, he would never be able to stop from crying, and she would rest her head on his shoulder as he did so.

Other than that, however, she hadn't seen him cry since she had experienced one of his breakdowns, three years ago… She sometimes could've sworn he was crying softly at night, but whenever she would sneak into his room to check on him he would appear to be sound asleep. Then again, he had cried after the funeral, too. He had sat down on the couch with his head in his hands and started to sob, but Sakura had been crying then, too, so it wasn't really on the same level as what had happened all that time ago…

Sakura exhaled a tired sigh. _He _is _getting better, though… At least he'll _cry _around me, even if it's only once in awhile…_

Shikamaru's image swam in front of her eyes, but she angrily shoved it aside. She didn't have the energy to think about him now.

Sakura rose slowly from her seat, suppressing a groan as her aching muscles were forced to move. She dug around in one of the beige packs on her hip for some money, placing a few coins neatly next to her finished tea. The owner looked up from his cleaning, his eyes crinkling at the corners in a smile.

"Thank you, come again," he said warmly. Sakura smiled and nodded respectfully at him before disappearing in a swirl of smoke and pink cherry blossoms.


	2. Animosity

Sorry it took so long... Potter mania dominated my life for awhile. Thanks to Tsukiyomi once again for the help and for always being on when I'm in the mood for a chat. Just remember to get _some _sleep, mkay?

Also for JKR for making the past 5 years of my life unforgettable. (Although, in the words of TK, "Even though we all know JKR doesn't read Naruto fanfiction, because she's a sensible adult who has a life.")

* * *

The rain was not nearly as heavy as Kakashi had anticipated. By the time he'd reached home, he wasn't soaked, much to his pleasure. However, he noticed sadly, his hair _had_ taken a beating - it was limp and damp with the rain that had touched it. The storm seemed to have moved away from Konoha, rather than coming into full swing in the center of the city, but while it was there it had managed to effectively piss Kakashi off. 

He landed gracefully outside one of the windows in his apartment, perching catlike on the sill as he undid several seals. Thrusting the window open with both hands, he swung inside and onto the squashy beige couch beneath it. His knees sinking into the worn cushions, he turned to pull the window tightly shut and put all of the usual seals back into place.

He shifted into a sitting position, discarding any proper posture as he leaned forward lazily, hunched over the coffee table. He allowed himself a small smile as he saw that his favorite chipped _choko_ was still sitting, seemingly untouched, on its dark green coaster, right where he had left it; apparently, Sakura had not thought to empty it of its now cold and tasteless contents before leaving for her own mission. He cupped a hand around it, tugging his mask down with the other as he pulled the drink up to his lips. He took a small sip before his face blanched, both of his eyes scrunched up as he spit the murky liquid back into the mug.

_Vinegar!?_

He placed it roughly back down on the coaster, grumbling mutinously as he rose to his feet. _Apparently, that girl still has a sense of humor… _he thought bitterly as he traipsed over to the kitchen to find something to rid his mouth of the foul taste. Honestly, he thought he had made it clear long ago that his things were not to be meddled with… No doubt Sakura felt the need to remind him that not _everyone_ approved of his fondness of sake. He shook his head, half in irritation and half in subtle admiration.

Although he was craving something stronger, he settled with a glass of lukewarm tap water, leaning against the kitchen counter as he sipped it slowly. He was more than a little disappointed that Sakura wasn't home; he had been looking forward to talking with her again, re-acquainting himself with her mannerisms. He couldn't remember the last time he had had a proper conversation with her. There had been brief exchanges here and there; a weary 'How-was-the-mission' followed by a grunt and a 'Good-how-was-yours', but he found himself yearning for the days when they would just sit down and _talk _for a while.

Pushing his wet hair out of his eyes irritably, he set the half-drained glass onto the counter. He pulled at the knot of cloth on the back of his head, tugging off and discarding his forehead protector as he migrated to his bedroom.

Sakura had, apparently, had mustered up the kindness to tidy up his room for him while he was away… That, or she hadn't been able to stand coming home every day to the same mess tainting the aura of cleanliness permeating the rest of the apartment. Either way, it benefited him so he wasn't complaining.

As he sat down on the perfectly made bed, a squat brown dog waddled in. Some of his fur was sticking up in odd directions and his entire body was sporting a coat of black soot.

"Where on earth have you been?" Pakkun asked grumpily, rubbing dejectedly at his wet black nose. "You were supposed to come back _ages _ago."

"You know just as well as I do that shinobi rarely return home on time," Kakashi sighed, his open black eye taking in the trail of black paw prints and Pakkun's questionable appearance in one brief sweep. "And where have _you _been?"

Pakkun let out a low growl. "The entire apartment is _clean_, Kakashi. _Clean. _It's unsettling, really. So unsettling that I found myself seeking out a good old _mess._"

Kakashi's Sharingan cracked open as he smiled beneath his mask.

"And this longing for dirt took you _where_, exactly?"

Pakkun sat up straight, his dignified posture betrayed by the smirk playing at his whiskery black lips. "Gai's place, of course."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow skeptically.

"Gai's house is spotless," he said, but at this, Pakkun grinned.

"Ah, but Gai has a _fireplace_."

* * *

Unlike Kakashi, Sakura had always preferred entering through the door. She saw little glamour in crouching on a thin windowsill when there was a perfectly good (and perfectly _dry_) doorstep in a far more accessible place. Besides, that couch had certainly seen better days, and she didn't feel the need to use it as a landing cushion when it suffered enough abuse already. 

Her heart skipped several beats as she approached the inviting wooden door; for the first time in a long time, she could feel the waves of another person's chakra drifting out from underneath the door. Fumbling excitedly for her keys, she hurriedly unlocked the door and stepped inside, letting it swing shut behind her.

The first thing she noticed was a lazily discarded hitai-ate sitting next to a half-finished glass of water on the kitchen counter. A grin spread across her face; that wasn't just _any_ hitai-ate.

The corners of her mouth turned down, however, when she saw the trail of smudged black paw prints leading straight across the recently scrubbed floor, disappearing from view as they curved past the door of Kakashi's room. One of her narrowed green eyes twitched violently; five minutes home and _already _Kakashi could be at least partially blamed for a brand new _mess._

Clenching her gloved fists tightly, Sakura marched over to her father's room. The low voices she could hear coming from inside faded as the door swung slowly open, creaking ominously.

The site that greeted her consisted of Kakashi, frozen in the middle of removing his shirt, and Pakkun, covered from head to stubby tail in some ungodly black dust.

"Sa-Sa-Sa-Sakura?" the dog stuttered, backing away from the flames shooting out of Sakura's eyes. "F-F-Fancy seeing you here—" He frantically tried to gather all of the soot into a smaller pile in an attempt to downplay its significance.

"_What_," Sakura growled, taking a step forward that split a floorboard in half, "is the meaning of _this_?" She gestured violently at the sooty mess surrounding Pakkun. Her other hand was placed firmly on her hip, demanding a quick and satisfying answer.

Kakashi, sensing immediate danger, finished pulling his tight black undershirt over the top of his head so that he could gauge the severity of the situation. Judging by the sparks jumping from Sakura's eyes and the tears running out of Pakkun's, things were already pretty bad. He put up his hands in a resigned sort of way, palms facing Sakura. "Sakura, it's not that bad, we can clean it—"

"_We _can clean it?" Sakura took another dangerous step in Kakashi's direction, sending Pakkun cowering at Kakashi's feet. "_We_? Need I remind you who _constantly _picks up after you? Need I tell you _again _to pick up your own damn mess?"

Kakashi faltered under her piercing gaze, taking a step back himself. "All right, all right, I'll clean it up, but give me a minute, okay?" He nodded his head towards his shirt, which was currently lying discarded on his bed. "I just got back a few minutes ago."

Sakura held her threatening pose for a few moments before deflating; she sighed deeply, letting her arms fall to her sides.

"All right, as long as you clean it…" Her voice trailed off as her eyes flickered upwards. They narrowed into two green slits as she noticed the numerous dirty bandages wrapped around her father's pale chest.

"Dad, how old are those bandages?" she asked, cocking her head to the side.

Kakashi blinked in confusion; Sakura nodded at his chest. He looked down, taking in his own rather battered appearance.

"Ah, it's nothing, they're…" He turned away from her, purposely avoiding eye contact as he bent over his bed and dug around in his bag for something. A pregnant pause hovered between them as he considered his answer.

Sakura walked over to him, pressing her palms against the blanket as she leaned over his bed, turning her head so that she was facing his open eye. "How old, Dad?"

Kakashi sighed, although Sakura could not tell if it was in irritation or resignation. "A few days," he muttered, uncapping some herbal ointment.

"A few?" Sakura repeated incredulously. "How many? Why weren't they changed? You realize that your wounds could be infected _again_—"

Kakashi snapped his head towards her so that their noses were nearly touching. Both of his eyes were open now, and they were narrowly focused on hers.

"I think I'm aware of the problem," he said roughly, his voice an irritated hiss. Sakura was taken aback by the amount of anger in his eyes; she pulled her head away from him a little.

"What happened?" she asked. Her accusatory tone was quickly turning into one of genuine curiosity.

Kakashi did not immediately change his expression. Biting his lip beneath his mask, he watched the fire in her eyes diminish as she continued to meet his gaze. After several long seconds, he realized that his right eye was open and he was consequently steadily losing energy. He screwed it shut, his black eye still focused on Sakura's green ones. As much as he longed to blink, something kept him from tearing his gaze away. It struck him for the first time how extraordinarily like his mother's her eyes were.

"What happened?" Her brow was now creased with worry.

Kakashi blinked, the spell broken. He straightened up, returning to his bag. The ointment dangling from one hand, he zipped it up and swung it over his shoulder; Sakura did not miss his wince of pain. As he began to walk out, ignoring the whimpers of the cowering Pakkun, Sakura followed, anger creeping into her tone again as she demanded an answer.

"What _happened?_"

Kakashi stopped so abruptly that Sakura ran right into him. He wheeled around, glaring as she rubbed her nose.

"It hardly matters," he said coldly; Sakura suspected this was how he used to speak to his Black Ops subordinates when they were being too nosy. He shifted his weight onto one foot, considering whether or not he should elaborate. Cold mockery crept into his tone as he said, "A very nasty man just used some very nasty methods when he tried to get a very scared man to talk."

Sakura cocked an eyebrow in anger. "Very funny," she almost hissed, crossing her arms. "What _really _happened?"

Kakashi shrugged, his black eye drooping in a familiar way. "I already told you," he said, turning his shoulder as if to keep walking. Sakura's firm glare, however, kept him rooted to the spot.

"It was just a mission as always, why do you care?" he said coolly; by this point, all pleasure at seeing her had evaporated. "You're old enough to know that—"

"Age has nothing to do with anything," Sakura spat. She wasn't sure why she was getting so angry; perhaps the loss of the hope that things would be different this time around, that they would grow closer, had turned her mood foul in an effort to cover up the disappointment. "You of all people should know that."

She had crossed a line there; Kakashi took a step back. The expression on his masked face was unreadable.

"We were interrogated," he said, his tone monotonous and routine, as if such a thing were a daily occurrence. "We killed the man before he could extract any information of value; needless to say, his comrades weren't too pleased about it. We only managed to shake them off just outside the village, killing three and bringing the fourth in for interrogation." His tone was almost accusatory as he added, "Happy?"

Sakura's hardened expression did not waver. "Did you have a medic nin handy?"

Kakashi shook his head. "She was the first killed," he said shortly. "They got her on the way in."

Sakura took a step forward. "Let me look at the wounds," she said, her tone softening slightly. She reached out a hand as if to touch the fresh scars creeping past the edge of the bandages. Kakashi, however, stopped her hand with his own. She looked up at him, an eyebrow raised, but was taken aback by his soft expression.

"I'll be fine," he said quietly. His eye curved in a smile. "Give me some credit; I was able to tidy up most of it myself."

Even after he had spoken, he did not remove his eye from hers, the smile still lingering on his features; he seemed to be seeing something else in her eyes. She blinked in confusion, which seemed to snap him out of his reverie. He blinked (although it looked more like a wink) and relinquished his grip on her hand. He patted her on the head, ruffling her hair with the tips of his fingers. _So much like Rin's… _He smiled again, although it seemed more nervous than benign. Without another word, he walked right past her and into his room, closing the door rather roughly behind him.

Sakura blinked twice before curling her gloved fingers into a shaking fist. _Why does he always have to treat me like a little girl? _she thought angrily. _He certainly didn't act like a child when _he _was fifteen._ She was so upset that she almost missed the sound of the window sliding open and a whooshing noise as Kakashi hopped out of it.

Her emerald eyes narrowed in anger.

_And just where does he think _he's _going?_

She stomped over to Kakashi's room, throwing the door open and letting it bounce to a close behind her. Her eyes narrowed even farther into two tiny green slits as she spotted the open window. She stormed towards it, sticking her head outside of it. The cold wind snapped at her flushed cheeks; another storm seemed to be moving steadily towards Konoha. She scowled at the silver blur darting from roof to roof. _Slippery bastard… _She shook her head angrily and swung herself out the window, slamming it shut behind her.

Sakura's landing was anything but graceful; she teetered dangerously on the edge of the rooftop before steadying herself. Gritting her teeth, she pushed off the weathered roof; a few wooden shingles were loosened and fell to the ground in her wake. She darted from roof to roof, no more than a pink blur.

She stopped abruptly on the top of a spiraling tower, balancing precariously on the stone ball at its top. She squinted through the soft rain that was starting to fall, angrily pushing her wet bangs out of her eyes. _Where could he be?_ She scanned the spider web of streets below her. Few people were outside; most were retreating from the coming storm into the shelter of their homes. Try as she might, she could find no flashes of silver betraying her father's location. One of her pale pink eyebrows arched, however, as she spotted a familiar spiky ponytail. It was moving at a slow and lazy pace down a near side street. She almost missed it; it blended in so well with its surroundings. Sakura could also make out an accompanying green blot of color through the thickening darkness.

_Shikamaru… _She nearly smiled, but instead frowned in confusion. Shikamaru had stopped moving, and now she could see the pale dot that was his face turning towards her. She leaned forward, trying to figure out why he was slowly raising his right arm. It looked like he was… beckoning her? With a high-pitched yelp she fell too far forward, losing her balance and falling off the tower.

She slid rapidly down the slick roof of the building she was on; she could feel the sharp black tiles grazing her legs and tearing at the back of her clothes. She quickly approached the edge of the roof, holding out her right foot. Just as she made contact with the edge she kicked off, flying through the air and landing hard on the ground two streets away.

She scrambled to her feet, unconsciously dusting herself off as her bright green eyes swept the surroundings. She deduced that she was a street away from where she had seen Shikamaru; splashing the nearest buildings, she raced through the maze of puddles that were quickly forming on the dirt road leading to her waiting boyfriend.

She sharply turned the corner onto the street where she had seen him, not looking where she was going; she ran right into something tall and wet.

"Ouch!" she muttered, backing up and clutching her reddening nose. She looked up, her eyes full of annoyance, but they widened in realization as she looked into the pale face of Shikamaru himself.

"Oh!" she exclaimed, straightening up. The fact that she had run straight into him aside, she was surprised to see the expression on Shikamaru's face. The skin around his eyes was creased with worry, nothing new there; and maybe it was just a trick of the light, but the shadows around his eyes looked darker than ever and seemed to carry an air of heavy sadness and resignation.

"Hey," he said, surprising her again with the heavy and uncharacteristically serious tone of his voice. He jerked his head lazily towards the direction Sakura had come from. "I saw you on top of that roof, you were pretty hard to miss with that crazy hair of yours." Despite the nature of his comment, his expression remained as somber as ever.

Sakura frowned. "Everything all right, Shika?" Sakura was pretty sure he had just made a joke— said something _funny, _so why wasn't he smiling…?

Shikamaru did not answer, glancing shiftily from left to right. "We need to talk," he said, his faze returning to Sakura.

She raised an eyebrow skeptically.

"About what?" Her tone was cold and unyielding.

Shikamaru suppressed a sigh. "About _us_," he said, gesturing weakly towards Sakura. Sakura's mouth fell open slightly, but she quickly masked this surprise with a fixed glare.

"What about us?"

Shikamaru could sense the anger creeping into her voice. His eyes widened as he realized that she was going to get very upset very fast. This realization, however, stiffened his resolve; it reminded him why he was going through with this to begin with. He silently and discreetly took a deep, calming breath, readying himself for what he had been anticipating for days now.

"I like you, Sakura," he said, and she could hear something close to fear trickling into his tone. "You're smart and pretty and fun to be around, but…" He sighed, running his hands through his hair in an all-too-familiar gesture. "I've just got so much on my plate right now… I mean, with Asu— Asuma-sensei gone, Kurenai is going to need my help with the baby…"

"Someone else could help with the baby," Sakura interrupted, her words tumbling after one another unevenly. She had been expecting this for awhile now, but the sheer realization that he was _breaking up with her _was still throwing her off.

Shikamaru looked uncomfortable, as if he had been expecting this question but hadn't prepared an answer. "But I promised to help her," he said, his discomfort apparent in the way his eyebrows narrowed over his worried eyes. His voice was very quiet as he continued; "I swore it… on Asuma-sensei's grave." He gulped; not to swallow tears, but to bite back unspoken words.

"And that's your reasoning?" Sakura said, working to keep her voice level. "You're doing _this_" — she couldn't bring herself to say "breaking up with me" — "because you feel more obligated to help Kurenai through her problems than to help me through mine?"

Shikamaru's eyes widened in surprise, and Sakura had to work to conceal her own. He kept his eyes open all the way, cocking his head to the side.

"What's wrong, Sakura?" he said, his voice soft with concern. "There's stuff you're… what kinds of... _problems_" —he tread around the word cautiously, afraid of the danger it held— "are you dealing with?"

Sakura turned her head away from him, snapping her eyes shut. "Why does it matter to you?" she said harshly. "After all, you have _a lot on your plate right now_… Don't you have pregnant women to go cry to?"

Shikamaru took a step back from her, his mouth falling slightly open in shock. He stood frozen for a few seconds, staring at the unspeakable anger etched onto her soft features. A particularly fierce gust of wind chose that moment to thunder past him, bringing him back to his senses. He narrowed his eyes, his open mouth tightening into a tight-lipped grimace. His lips twitched at the edges and his mouth curled into a twisted smile; both uncharacteristic and unbecoming of him.

"Harsh," he said bitterly, his voice dripping with sarcasm. He shoved his hands in his pockets, staring up at the billowing storm clouds ruefully. "But can I really expect any different?"

Sakura cracked her eyes open in spite of herself, eyeing him suspiciously. Shikamaru, his head still tilted upwards, let his gaze flicker to her before returning to the dark sky. He permitted himself a small chuckle. "I expected you to spit out some bitter retort… after all, that's what _he _would've done."

It was Sakura's turn to let her mouth fall open in shock; she turned her head towards him fully, giving him her undivided attention.

Shikamaru could feel her gaze on him; he brought his head back down and looked her straight in the eye. A cold frown decorated his face, and when he next spoke, the bitterness in his voice had been drained of sarcasm and was now sour.

"You've done a pretty good job of pretending," he said darkly. "Everyone seems to think you've stopped missing him, that you've been handling yourself _so _well." The anger was crawling rapidly into his voice. "But you care more than you let on, don't you? You still have some dumb, little-girl crush on him—"

"Shut up!" Sakura snapped, curling her fingers into a fist (not for the first nor the last time that day). "You don't know a damn thing about Sasuke, so stop trying to—"

"Of course, you probably think it's more than that," Shikamaru interrupted her loudly, his volume overriding hers. His lip was turning up in a dark sneer. "Even though the guy never gave you so much as a hug or even a friendly smile, you find yourself so infatuated with him that you're sure it must be _love_—"

Shikamaru was cut off by a powerful slap to the face. He staggered backwards in surprise, his hand automatically moving up to the bright five-star pulsing on his otherwise pale face. He brushed it gingerly with the tips of his calloused fingers, wincing in pain as the mark stung wildly.

"Don't you _dare_," Sakura began dangerously, rubbing her fist into her opposite hand, "talk about Sasuke like you— like you—"

"Like I what?" Shikamaru had taken several steps further away from where Sakura stood, her chest heaving as she worked hard to control her raging anger. "Like I'm not a replacement for him?"

It took Sakura's brain a few seconds to register the meaning of Shikamaru's remark. When she realized just what he had said, she took a step away from him, her arms falling limply to her sides. She was gaping open-mouthed at him as if she had never seen him properly before. The angry red color faded out of her cheeks as two hot, pearly tears ran down them, running down her face and dripping off of her chin.

Shikamaru hesitated before speaking, as if a small piece of him wanted to stay behind and comfort her, but the handprint on his cheek chose that moment to pulse angrily; he rubbed it angrily, scowling.

"And you wonder why I'm breaking up with you," he muttered darkly. He performed a few quick hand signs before disappearing in a flurry of smoke, leaving Sakura standing alone in the rain with nothing but the howling wind to dry her tears.


	3. Reason

I'm not going to bother to try to apologize. I don't own Naruto. Pwease don't sue.

* * *

Sakura stood frozen for a few long moments before the puddles swimming around her ankles dragged her back to reality. She turned sharply on her heel, not bothering to wipe the angry tears from her eyes as she ran drunkenly down the streets, narrowly avoiding running into buildings and fences. She weaved her way through the familiar streets, not even aware of where her feet were leading her. She eventually found herself tearing into the apartment building, storming up the stairs, throwing open the door and flinging herself down on the couch, sobbing into one of the worn beige pillows.

Her anguished screams and relentless sobbing rang throughout the whole apartment, startling its other two inhabitants. Pakkun and Kakashi were in the bathroom when they heard her crying, raw and loud; Pakkun was nearly submerged in soapy water, grumbling as Kakashi, who was now wearing his forehead protector, scrubbed furiously at the dog's matted fur. His heavily bandaged hand fell limp, however, as he straightened his back, listening to Sakura's sobs. The echoes of familiar cries mingled with the very real ones coming from the main room; Kakashi shook these out of his head, frowning.

"'Zat Sakura?" Pakkun said curiously, poking his head out over the edge of the tub. His half-lidded eyes looked hopeful; a glorious savior had descended from the heavens in an effort to halt the dreaded _bath time _and whisk him away to a world of dirt and grime and…

Kakashi stood up, interrupting his gleeful thoughts; this sent Pakkun sliding down the tub as miniature waves of water spurred him forward. By the time he had slid headfirst into the wall, Kakashi was already hurriedly drying off his long, pale legs with a stiff white towel. He cast the towel aside and hurried out of the bathroom, determined to find out what the hell had gotten Sakura so worked up.

She did not look up when she sensed him coming; she merely cried harder, pressing the pillow against her face.

He approached her cautiously; offering comfort had never been his specialty, particularly when it came to teenage girls.

"Er, Sakura…?" he ventured, crouching beside the couch. She squirmed away from him, her sobs doubling in volume. The last thing she felt she needed was Kakashi trying to comfort her like he would a small child. Already she felt her tears of despair being replaced by hot little tears of humiliation; she was _not _a little girl and didn't think or feel like one _—despite what Shikamaru had to say, the bastard— _and _certainly _did not need to be treated like one.

"Get away from me!" The words were barely discernible through her heavy sobs. "I don't need you!"

Kakashi shifted his weight uncomfortably from foot to foot; he was balancing on the balls of his feet, afraid of saying too much— he knew how dangerous it would be to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Scratching the back of his neck, he said lamely, "Is everything all right?"

Even through her tears, Sakura managed to throw Kakashi the dirtiest glare she could muster. The expression was fleeting, however; her face quickly scrunched together as sobs overcame her again.

_Why the hell am I_ crying _about this? _Inner Sakura raged, rubbing her fist menacingly into the palm of her other hand. _I should be beating the shit out of that good-for-nothing, lazy-ass Shikamaru if anything, not sitting around sobbing my apparently _girly_ little heart out—_

Inner Sakura's enraged ramblings were drowned out by Sakura's renewed tears, which washed over all traces of anger, leaving them bubbling mutinously beneath the surface.

Kakashi blinked once, his only visible eye slightly wider than usual. He leaned forward, still perched in his favorite position, his palms resting firmly on his knees.

"Sakura, what happened?" he asked, his tone more serious this time. Sakura turned her head farther away from him, still crying shamelessly into the damp pillow. She was digging her fingers into it so fiercely that her nails had started to tear at the fabric. She was forcing her foot against arm of the chair, which caused some unpleasant creaking noises that Kakashi tried, for the moment, to ignore.

"Sakura?" Kakashi leaned ever forward, his head cocked to the side and his usually emotionless black eye widened in concern. His face was now dangerously close to Sakura's, by her standards, which managed to upset her even more. She shifted her head so that she could see him through blurry eyes, her face contorted with anger. In the blink of an eye, she had raised her right arm and aimed a punch at Kakashi's long, cloth-covered nose. Just as fast as the attack had come, however, it had been blocked; Kakashi had caught Sakura's punch (weakened rather than strengthened by her emotional state) in the palm of his right hand, firmly gripping her clenched fist with his other.

"What. Is. Wrong?" Kakashi demanded calmly, tightening his grip on Sakura's violently shaking fist. Her clouded green eyes flickered to his politely concerned black one; she scowled angrily, clenching her teeth together.

"Let _go _of me," she hissed dangerously, her arm writhing as she tried to free herself.

Kakashi's expression remained unchanged as he answered her with an even-tempered, "Tell me what's wrong."

Sakura's left hand flew to Kakashi's; she tried to pry his fingers off of her own, digging her nails into his unmoving appendages.

"Let go of me, you perverted bastard," she seethed, threatening to crush the delicate bones in his fingers with her feverish clawing.

Kakashi raised a pale gray eyebrow. In a flash of motion he had both of her hands clasped in his own, pressing down on them tightly.

"What happened?" he repeated in that unnervingly calm voice.

Sakura let out a low growl, her entire body shaking as she tried to escape from his grip; she was now propped up on her elbows, her body twisted to face Kakashi. She was digging her toes into the crevice between the cushion and the firm arm of the groaning couch.

Kakashi glanced at the muscles tensing and the blood vessels throbbing in her lower neck as she struggled to escape his grasp; Sakura mistook this as an unbelievably casual sweep of her cleavage, which was being increased by her forced-together biceps. Unaware of the misunderstanding, Kakashi was mildly taken aback by the look of fresh rage that was quickly contorting Sakura's beet-red face.

"_Pervert_!" she shrieked indignantly, spit flying from her mouth and landing on Kakashi's dark mask. "How sick _are _you, is this the type of situation you fathered _me _in?" Her chest heaved with her labored breaths as she glared at him, fire jumping from her eyes as she glowered at him.

Kakashi's eyebrow flew even farther up in confusion. He was a pervert, yes, but certainly not in an incestuous manner; why did she seem so upset about this all of the sudden? And was the slight about Rin entirely necessary? _Maybe she met a drunkard out on the streets? _He mentally shrugged, returning his attention to the situation at hand.

A distraction, however, arrived in the sound of the muffled sounds of four stubby legs trotting across the carpeted floor. Leaving a trail of water in his wake, Pakkun came to a stop a few feet away from where Kakashi was crouched. His two droopy eyes lazily swept over Kakashi and Sakura; if he couldn't sense the anger radiating off of the pink-haired teen, he would have wheezed with mirth at the sorry sight of them.

"And what's got your panties in a bundle?" Pakkun asked Sakura, cocking his head and scratching at one of his floppy ears. Kakashi's visible black eye flashed in his direction, giving Pakkun a look that quite clearly told the dog that he had _said the wrong thing._

Sakura let out another angry growl; Kakashi felt the skin on his palm break as she tore at it with her nails.

"So the dog's a pervert too?" Her tone was jarring and unpleasant, carrying a hint of distasteful sarcasm. "Poor animal, you probably abuse him just as much as you abused my poor mother, huh?"

Pakkun whimpered, realizing that the anger Sakura was directing at Kakashi wasn't the same type of anger she channeled into the muttered threats she regularly gave Naruto and Sai. He scurried to Kakashi's side, peering at Sakura with a mix of curiosity and fear from behind the Copy Ninja's back. In Kakashi's brain, too, it finally clicked that Sakura was genuinely _pissed._

His eye narrowed as it flickered back to Sakura. "What the hell has gotten into you?" he asked, his frown evident even through his mask. "What happened while you were gone?"

"Why does it matter to you?" Sakura spat. "Since when have you given a damn about what happens to me, you hardly even talk to me—"

"I care very much about what happens to you." Kakashi's words pushed their way through gritted teeth, and a bead of sweat rolled down his face; it was getting harder to restrain Sakura, as she was focusing her anger into the effort of removing his hands. His eye traced the path of a bead of sweat running down her cheek, but swiveled back to meet her angry gaze as she let out a derisive snort.

"I'm sure that's what you said to my mother, too," she jeered, a sneer twisting her face. "Before you _raped_ her—"

"I did not rape your mother!" This time, he was not so good at hiding his anger; it was clear to Sakura that he was growing upset.

"Then you were drunk, probably," Sakura said loudly, "or at least she was, if my mother was as great as everyone says she was there's no way in hell she'd sleep with someone like _you_—" _Someone like Shikamaru, the bastard…_

Kakashi's grip slackened only the slightest bit as he blinked, a blank look on his face as he drank in such a low insult; Sakura took advantage of this and tried to force her way out of his grip, but Kakashi noticed immediately and forced her wriggling wrists against her chest, leaning in even closer to her in order to put more pressure on her arms. Her entire body tensed at this new closeness; she scrunched her face up, reared her head back and spat in his face.

Kakashi concealed a gasp as he felt the moistness through his mask. His eyes widened in shock; Pakkun's fur bristled accordingly as he growled at Sakura, letting out a low, warning bark.

"What in hell is wrong with you, Sakura?" Kakashi said, astonished. "What happened while you were—"

"I'll tell you what happened," Sakura snarled, her anger increasing as she felt her own knuckles being pressed further into her chest. "A little pervert like you with… with an _attraction_, apparently, to older women decided that I was some preppy little bitch with a schoolgirl crush on a dead boy and wasn't worth his time!"

The last part had flowed out of her in one breath; her chest was heaving as she tried to force herself to calm down (although it was rather late for that now). She couldn't bring herself to look into that dull black eye, instead focusing on the wad of saliva currently decorating Kakashi's masked cheek.

Kakashi felt a plunging sensation in the pit of his stomach; so Shikamaru had dumped Sakura, and she was channeling her anger into forcing empathy down his throat. Judging by what she had just exhaled, Shikamaru had tried to use taking care of Kurenai (the "older woman" he was "apparently attracted" to, Kakashi assumed) as a reason (although Sakura had taken it as an excuse) to terminate the relationship. When Sakura had protested, he had made a low blow and brought up Sasuke… An inadvisable move, but the damage had been done and now Sakura was feeling sorely heartbroken and negatively disposed towards the world of men. _And, unfortunately for me, I just happened to be the next man she ran into…_

He considered his sigh before he let it out: on the one hand, Sakura did not need any further prodding in a bad direction; on the other, she had just _spit _on him. No rejection, no matter how cruel, merited spitting on your own _father_, for heaven's sake.

The sigh had the predicted effect, which was causing the level of red in Sakura's face to go up a few notches; her teeth were bared as she readied herself for all-out attack, dredging up the little bits of information she had gathered about her father over the years and planning out a way to spit them at him (perhaps not as literally as she had earlier) so that they would stab at him in the worst way. She was enraged that he had had the nerve to waltz right in while she was _clearly _at a very fragile emotional point and _obviously _needed to be alone. And then, of course, he had gotten so damn _close _to her and continued to badger her after she had made it pain-stakingly clear that she did _not _need his support.

Before she could open her mouth to dish out some fresh insult, however, he spoke quietly.

"Sakura, it's not the end of the world."

She blinked twice in shock; could he _honestly_ be that clichéd? Seemingly oblivious to her indignation, however, he continued, uttering his words carefully in a way Sakura wished she could call "understanding" so that she could hate him for all the standard reasons.

"Shikamaru's just working out his priorities right now," he said, his voice quieter than Sakura had ever heard it, "he's a fifteen-year-old boy who promised his dead sensei he'd watch over his wife and kid… He's just a teenager and isn't ready to—"

"Oh, don't even _start_ with that," Sakura said shrilly; "I don't want to hear that from _you_, of all people—"

"Because I actually know where he's coming from?" Kakashi's voice was still quiet, but now it was angry, too.

"Because it's terribly hypocritical of you," she said, her eyes moving up to lock with his. They were alight with the fire of her fresh anger for him. _He _would _bring that up, trying to use that in his defense, the typical bastard!_

"Is it hypocritical to understand one's own mistakes and apply them to current situations?" he asked smoothly. All traces of anger had been erased from his tone.

"_No_, it's just—it's just so typical of you, siding with _Shikamaru_, the lazy genius _so much _like your goddamn self, even after what he—"

"I'm not _siding _with anyone, I'm simply reminding you that your side of the story isn't the only one—"

"Because you're some all-knowing being with _all _of the answers, of course, who can magically solve any—"

"No, because I've been fifteen years old before, and I was stupid then too—"

Sakura laughed shrilly. "Oh yes, I know all about that, Mistake Number One is sitting right here in front of you—"

"Sakura!" Sakura was taken aback by the forcefulness with which he said her name. "Will you stop the personal attacks and just look at this situation _reasonably_—?"

"Easy for you to say!" she shouted. "I suppose you've never been dumped before—"

"That's irrelevant, I've seen enough people end relationships to know that people move on in life, especially when you're only a teenager—"

"_You_ never _'moved on in life!_' " Sakura said. "Fifteen years since my mother died and you've never seen a woman since—"

"Your mother _died_, Sakura!" Kakashi was shouting too now, and Sakura could almost sense a hint of desperation in his voice. "She died because of something _I _did, or didn't do— she didn't… didn't '_dump me and go on with her life'_—"

"No thanks to _someone_—"

Kakashi looked like he was about to keep arguing, but was suddenly overwhelmed by the thought that it _simply wasn't worth it_. There was no point trying to reason with Sakura, he figured; she had always been exceptionally difficult, particularly when it came to romance. He fixed her with a weary look, mentally summarizing the situation. Sakura was beyond his grasp; no amount of reasoning would shift her pessimistic disposition. Trying to calmly present the other side of the situation and prod her towards a mental compromise hadn't worked out; not only had it pushed her even farther towards breaking point, but her jarring comments had sent a stabbing sensation plunging farther down into his heart than he was comfortable with. If things continued in this direction, they'd be tangled up in a violent shouting match inside of five minutes. His only choice was to resign in not so many words, backing out of the argument before it got too… messy.

He almost sighed before deciding that it would be a bad way to start the retreat that needed to be so expertly executed. Instead, he prepared himself by shutting his eye for a few seconds before cracking it open again, his gaze harder than before.

"Sakura." It wasn't a question; merely a calm statement, theoretically innocent. The glare she gave him in return certainly wasn't soft, but it wasn't accusing either (at least not as much so as before); he took this as an invitation to continue speaking (although he would've continued either way).

When he did so, he focused his concentration on keeping his tone as level as possible. "We're obviously not seeing eye to eye right now; I understand that you're feeling pretty stressed, and I'm sorry that I was naïve enough to intrude upon your… grieving—" (_Although such a trivial situation hardly merits the term_) "—but I do want you to understand that I was — and still am — genuinely concerned about you." He tried not to make the look he gave her too meaningful, knowing full well how much teenagers detested that look. He certainly refrained from squeezing her hand, himself unable to stand that particular comforting gesture. A pause hung in the air, as if he were going to say more, but he decided against it and let the opportunity die.

Sakura waited to make sure he was done talking before speaking herself— if she interrupted him, he could use it as ammunition later. After all, it's what _she _would do.

"No offense," she started, struggling to keep her voice civil, "but I don't—" She stopped herself, taking a deep breath. _Don't let him win, _she warned herself. _You can't let him be the "mature" one here._ "I'm just not… just not comfortable with you getting… getting _involved _with my personal life."

_Doesn't being your father automatically include me in at least some aspects of your personal life? _Kakashi wondered immediately. He firmly decided against saying this, of course; he could see the game she was struggling to play and wasn't about to walk into such an easy trap— he _was _the adult here.

"I can respect that," he said, the default response coming so easily out of his mouth. He had been careful not to use the word "understand"; in his experience, teenagers were automatically turned off by that word— they didn't want adults to _understand _them, they wanted to be _respected_. He cocked his head to the side; he had pulled it away from her at some point during his deliberations. "Still, I would hope that you'd be more concerned if I hadn't bothered to find out what was wrong with you." Making it a statement seeking confirmation made it seem as if Sakura had the power here; it was much better than putting it into a question, which could hint at underlying accusation.

Sakura could tell what he was playing at, inwardly scowling at how carefully, how _easily_ he was toying with her. Minutes before she would have spat something back at him, but she was cooling down now, wizening up; that would be dancing right into the palms of his hands. Biting back the retort she longed to give him, she instead adopted the pretense he had and spoke coolly, if not calmly.

"I'm not upset that you're concerned," she said, wondering dimly if she could have phrased it in a less… assuming way? She wasn't quite sure how to put it, nor did she care. "I'm just not a big fan of how you're trying to put yourself down on my level, getting involved with my personal business." Okay, so much for calm and collected… But it got the point across. After all, someone like Kakashi was smart enough to understand the meaning of what you say no matter how you say it; trying to sound clever is just a waste of brain power after a fashion.

Kakashi's head cocked a fraction of an inch further, his one-eyed expression remaining impassive. It was almost funny, how much her words mirrored things that he himself had said. Almost.

Wheels were spinning rapidly in Sakura's brain; without her even noticing, more words came tumbling out of her mouth before Kakashi could so much as blink. "I mean, I don't get involved with your business, right?"

A pale eyebrow raised in response.

"Well…"

Sakura nearly rolled her eyes.

"Oh come on, Kakashi—"

_(He decided to let the first-name use slide…_)

"— When have I _ever _gotten involved with your romantic life?"

A pause.

"Sakura…" Kakashi began slowly, something that wasn't quite sadness creeping into his voice, "I don't _have _a romantic life."

That one threw Sakura off; her mouth had been open in preparation to continue with her little plan. She closed her mouth once before opening it again to speak.

"Still, I haven't asked you about it, have I?" she pressed. "Or—" (here she was crossing into dangerous waters, but desperate times call for desperate measures) "— When I've heard you— When I've heard you crying over my mother, I haven't—"

In a blur of movement, Kakashi's hands were no longer holding Sakura's against her chest. They were held up defensively, palms out, and in his single black eye there was now a frightened expression; that of a cornered animal, Sakura thought.

"All right, all right…" Sakura blinked once; his voice sounded irritable, and when she looked at him again the scared look had vanished from his eye. "Let's not go there, okay?"

It was Sakura's turn to raise an eyebrow. He definitely looked annoyed, but she privately felt that it was pretty shallow. It seemed a poor attempt to hide the emotions becoming apparent in the way the color in his face was rising.

"Kind of late for that," she said, surprised at the frostiness of her own voice.

Kakashi closed his eyes, keeping them shut for several moments and secretly basking in the comfort of not having to meet Sakura's gaze. He took a few deep, steadying breaths, reminding himself that this was Sakura, she always said things like this _(but you know she doesn't, don't you?)_, and there was no reason to take it personally _(but what other way could it possibly be taken?)_.

Her impatience radiated off of her like a demonic aura, dragging his eyelids apart. As he glared at her with a watering eye, she shifted into a sitting position on the couch, crossed her arms against her chest, and made a soft clucking noise with her tongue.

Kakashi blinked again, this time to chase the water out of his eyes. When he returned his gaze to hers he looked for all the world as if he were holding all the cards again, showing polite interest in whatever she had to say.

"You were saying?" he said, praying his voice wasn't as unsteady as it felt.

Sakura hesitated before starting again. "The point is that I haven't bothered you and you haven't bothered me, and we've been getting along reasonably well, haven't we?"

_But you know that's not what you want, _a small voice whispered in the back of her mind. _Weren't you the one so excited to see him when he came back from his mission? Hadn't you resolved to foster a better relationship?_

She pushed the voice away, focusing on him. Normally she'd be able to see the wheels working furiously behind peoples' eyes, but when she bored into his solitary black eye all she could see was lonely resignation, colored by sadness.

_You see that? That's not what he wants to hear, he wanted to get to know you better too— _

Why couldn't she read him? Everyone was readable; Tsunade had taught her that much. You could tell from a person's eyes what they were going through; she had been made to practice this delicate art form.

_Stop lying to yourself, you can read him just fine—_

"Reasonably well, yes."

His voice took her by surprise; she had been so busy trying to block that other voice out of her head, the one sort of like her own but quieter, calmer. She swallowed once, chasing the voice away and gathering her thoughts.

"So why don't we keep things that way?"

No eye movement. She plowed on.

"I mean, up until now it's been an unspoken code, sort of—"

_More like unspoken fear—_

"— But now, I think, we should 'officially' establish it."

"Establish what, exactly?" Smooth as glass.

"That you keep to your business and I keep to mine."

She was surprised to see his eye widen slowly, slightly. Afraid of his reaction, her eyes swiveled down to his hands, which were still being held up rather limply. She squinted in spite of herself; were they… _trembling?_

Her eyes snapped back up towards his as he cleared his throat; a quick glance towards his fingers told her that either she had been imagining things or the shaking had stopped. He looked unsettled, as if he were hiding his true colors but wasn't sure that he ought to be. He brought his head back into a straight position, looking her hard in the eye. She focused her concentration on looking at his eyes without really seeing them, which proved hard to do seeing as she had been trained to do the exact opposite. Still, she thought she managed rather nicely, ignoring the emotions so clearly coming across from his troubled expression.

"That sounds reasonable, I suppose," he said carefully.

Normally, Sakura would have challenged his hesitancy, but here she felt the matter should not be pressed.

_Or you just don't want to question your own reasoning._

Sakura mentally growled at the voice, warning it to slither back to whatever dark crevice it had crawled out of. Her exterior, however, portrayed a politely pleased image—nothing too suspicious.

_He's always suspicious. Or just worried._

"All right then," she said delicately, brushing imaginary dust off her knees. Kakashi backed out of her way as she rose to her feet, a bounce in her step that she couldn't help but feel was forced. Her father remained crouched in front of her, his dog sitting loyally at his feet. Pakkun's permanent frown was more pronounced than usual, the folds and creases of skin around his muzzle making it look like his face was melting.

Sakura's eyes, having nowhere to go, skipped over the tips of his spikes and swept the room, trying to land anywhere but on him. Eventually she blinked and shook her head briskly, sidestepping him to walk towards her room without sparing him a glance.

Kakashi did not move his head as she left the scene, staring at the spot she had been sitting at with a look of dull recognition on his face. After the bedroom door slammed shut behind Sakura, Pakkun lifted his gaze dolefully to Kakashi. His master blinked slowly, closing his eyes on the third blink and letting out a deep breath he didn't know he had been holding. He ran his fingers through his hair, turning to return Pakkun's gaze.

"Well…" he muttered, bringing his hand down to scratch Pakkun behind the ear, "I suppose it could've been worse."

Pakkun let out a low chuckle.

"'Swat they all say, innit?" His low, appreciative growling blurred his words.

Kakashi couldn't bring himself to smile.


	4. Pillow Punching

Author's Note: I know it's short and I know it's kind of filler, but… It has been forever since an update and I don't want to rush into things, either… Um, sorry if it's melodramatic, too. So… apologies all around, I guess. Although! Part of the reason I was so reluctant to update is that I got only one review for chapter 3! ONE REVIEW! It's been out for over a month and people are putting it on Alert and stuff, but one review::cries:: Reviews are my inspiration! I neeed them!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, and it is highly doubtful that I ever will. I get no money from this. Just headaches. And reviews, usually!

Dedication: This chapter is dedicated to **anbu10**, the person who reviewed chapter 3. Many thanks! I love all of my reviewers, but special thanks to **anbu10** for letting me know what s/he thought of chapter 3 when no one else dared to do so! Especially since I loved chapter 3 lots... whereas I'm kinda iffy about this chapter.

* * *

"_What happened? What happened? What happened?"_

Again and again the question was beaten into the sides of her skull. It came in two varieties: one, the voice of a concerned daughter; the second, a concerned father. His rumbling baritone mingled with her high pitch as it resounded inside her head, echoing in every dark crevice of her mind.

"_What happened?"_

(…)

Although Sakura's gaze had been focused on the window for about half an hour, she hadn't registered that it was raining. Over and over again, she was re-playing the events of the afternoon as if they were a movie in her head. She had run through the events over a dozen times now, and the sequence of things was starting to get fuzzier and fuzzier.

"_What kinds of… _problems _are you dealing with?"_

_Someone_ had said that to her, but she couldn't remember who… either Shikamaru or Kakashi, it was so hard to tell sometimes…

"_But you care more than you let on, don't you?"_

Again, a tough one: she settled on Shikamaru, because she seemed to associate the quote with the wind rustling through his hair ominously.

"_I don't need you!"_

She was sure she had said that one, but somehow it came out sounding like Shikamaru.

"_I care very much about what happens to you."_

She let out a derisive snort; that one had to have been Kakashi. Shikamaru had made it clear to her that he didn't give a rat's ass about what happened to her.

"_I've been fifteen years old before, and I was stupid then too—"_

Kakashi; he had tried to pull the "I've been there" speech on her, much to her annoyance.

"_Will you stop the personal attacks and just look at this situation reasonably—?"_

"_We've been getting along reasonably well, haven't we?"_

"_Reasonably well, yes."_

"_That sounds reasonable, I suppose."_

"_Or you just don't want to question your own reasoning."_

No matter who had said it, it came down to being _reasonable._ Everything was _reasonable_— nothing was certain, nothing was perfectly all right. All it was in the end was a compromise that left a sick feeling in Sakura's stomach. And then there was that voice, the one that was almost hers, nagging in a motherly sort of way and trying to pose the other side of the situation to her. Sakura tried her best to shove this voice and its "everyone's human" logic out of her mind; she didn't_ care _what either of the men were. Or, more reasonably (how she hated the word now), she couldn't _let_ herself care. If she were to start wallowing in her own self-loathing and regretting every last word she had spat at either of the pair — Shikamaru, Kakashi, what was the difference in the end? — she'd have no room left to be angry with them, and for Sakura, anger came first. Sure, they had _reasons _for saying the things they'd said and doing the things they'd done, but she'd had reasons too, hadn't she? She'd had every right to get as angry as she did, hadn't she?

_No,_ the voice was telling her softly. _No, you didn't._ But Sakura didn't care what that voice had to say about it; reading in between the lines, all the voice was doing was demanding reason, same as the rest of them. Hadn't Tsunade once said something about reason to her? Something about it being subjective? After all, reason was abstract, a concept that can't be strictly defined. It was up to the victims of circumstance to decide what steps to take.

Sakura let out a frustrated scream, muffled by the pillow she was burying her face into and drowned out by the ever-hammering rain. Why did everything have to be so _difficult?_

(…)

Kakashi collapsed onto his bed, glaring moodily out the window. He shifted onto his side before curling up into a ball, clutching angrily at his forehead.

_Why? Why? Why?_

The anger coursed through his body like a disease, dredging up every last dirty feeling he had ever had about himself and blaring it into his ears. He screwed his eyes shut but he couldn't block out the images, playing in his mind for him like a bloody montage of anything and everything concerning either Rin or Sakura. Innocent laughter to shrill screams… trivial arguments to bloody battles… heated sex to heart-wrenching sobs… It all blurred together, a never-ending reel of anguish and self-loathing that all seemed to end in a girl with short brown hair or emerald green eyes, crying her heart out and screaming herself hoarse.

He had been trying for three years now, and he thought that he had been doing a pretty damn good job; he cried less often now and it didn't hurt so much to look at Sakura. Sasuke's death had been very, very hard on him; his recovery from that had stunted the more long-term rehabilitation of his mind and his heart. He realized now, with painful clarity, how as he was becoming more and more absorbed in the past again he had lost sight of just how fragile his daughter was becoming. Sakura was strong, of course; she had monstrous strength and a fiery will. But she was a kunoichi of the Village Hidden in the Leaves, and with that title came the inevitable burden of heartbreak. She had been dealt a staggering blow and still, it seemed, didn't trust her own father enough to confide in him at such a difficult time in her life. Indeed, he thought angrily, she had probably confided more in Tsunade than in him.

But was Sakura really to blame? He had never exactly reached out a hand to her, but he had never been _cold_, had he?

He blinked twice, sitting up in the bed and rubbing his Sharingan with the heel of his hand. _Maybe I'm over-thinking things, _he thought as he gazed out the window. _Those things she said… Sakura's smart, and understanding about this sort of thing… She can't honestly believe that I would want to hurt her… or would have wanted to hurt Rin…_

No, he reasoned, Sakura had been primarily angry with Shikamaru. Although the boy was a genius, he could have been a lot more tactful about dumping Sakura. Perhaps it was a sign of his own emotional fatigue that he would sink to insulting what had been the basis of Sakura's very existence for so long… Her infatuation with Sasuke had defined her for years. Sakura was choosing to ignore the very real problems that were facing Shikamaru, too… A lot of things were plaguing the young chuunin and a girlfriend simply wasn't high on his priority list. If Sasuke hadn't passed, they probably could have worked something out, but one man couldn't deal with two women grieving the losses of loved ones. When it came down to it, Shikamaru's loyalties lay with his dead sensei and the family he had left behind— the family he had promised to protect. That, coupled with the death of someone he had failed to save, was weighing heavily on Shikamaru and coping with the added grief of Sakura's distress was too much for him to handle.

But Sakura couldn't allow herself to sympathize with Shikamaru; it simply wasn't an option for her. In her mind, fifteen-year-old boys were just as responsible for their words and actions as men twice their age. Of course, Kakashi knew that it had been wrong of Shikamaru to say those things, but he had a strong feeling of empathy for Asuma's protégé.

And then, of course, he empathized with Sakura on a deep level because he knew painfully well what it was like to lose a loved one at fifteen. The circumstances had been different, but it boiled down to the same gnawing emptiness… Sakura felt responsible for being unable to stop Sasuke from leaving the village in the first place, and there seemed to be nothing anyone could say or do that would alleviate the guilt that was tearing her apart. Kakashi was genuinely afraid for Sakura and wanted to wring his own neck for agreeing to her little pact of disinterest; his job was to protect her, dammit, not to give her equal footing to him! He had half a mind to march into her room and demand her to see reason, but something told him she wouldn't take to kindly to the intrusion. After all, that's how this whole business had started, wasn't it? He was just a father concerned that his daughter came home sobbing. He wondered bitterly just how angry she'd be if he had chosen to ignore her; he'd have ended up in the shouting match of a lifetime and on the receiving end of countless accusations and insults.

He sighed, running his hand through his hair. He glanced at the mask he had discarded on the floor; the glob of Sakura's spit was glittering in the dim light.

God, how would his father have punished him if he had so much as _touched_ his face? Such a thing had never crossed his mind as a child— he had been bred not to even consider physically retaliating when his father was reprimanding him. He almost laughed at how poor of a father he himself was turning out to be, but somehow he felt more like crying.

(…)

As a little girl, Sakura would often stare at the ceiling and find patterns in the strange shapes the raised paint made. She would find comfort in the little stories that would play out for her; she would see animals and people and flowers, calming down as she imagined the sorts of conversations they would have.

Now, however, she was finding no solace in the images forming in front of her. All she was seeing was Sasuke: somehow every line became a strand of his spiky black hair, an irritated frown, his long neck… her thoughts seemed to have dragged themselves inevitably to her raven-haired lost love. Had Shikamaru just been a replacement for Sasuke? Had she been so desperate to get away from the thought of him that she had distanced herself from anything that served as a reminder of her own failure? Was that why she hardly talked to Naruto anymore, or why feelings of anger and bitterness towards her father had been resurfacing? It made sense, she supposed… It would explain why she would cringe whenever she saw Sai, or why she would feel the urge to crack the glass of Team 7's photograph whenever she saw it on the windowsill.

She blinked once. _Wait… I still have the picture on my windowsill? _She propped herself up on her elbows and squinted at the window. Yes, it was still there, right where it had been for three years now… She was genuinely surprised that she hadn't, in her anger or anguish, destroyed it. She reached out a hand to grab it; she halted the movement abruptly when her finger was almost touching the glass. Her hand remained frozen in its outstretched position for several agonizingly long moments as she observed the picture; the lighting was poor, but she had memorized it to the last shadow. The day it was taken came immediately to mind, although it was fuzzier than the last time she had thought about it… It really had been a long time ago, when she had stood there, squished in between her two male teammates, her tongue sticking defiantly out of her mouth as she dodged the sparks flying between Sasuke and Naruto.

Her lip trembled as she extended her finger, brushing the side of her own face. How young she had been then… The grinning little girl whose happiness was captured and frozen forever by the photographer… she hadn't suspected that life would ever be difficult, or that her road would be plagued by death and heartbreak. No, at thirteen she had envisioned a perfect world where she grew up to be a successful ninja; marry her sweetheart, Sasuke Uchiha; and live with him happily ever after.

She slid her half-lidded gaze to Sasuke, who was standing to the right of her and scowling something awful. He was glaring shiftily at Naruto, ignoring the pink-haired girl beside him as he always had. Naruto, too, was glaring over the top of her head; his teeth were bared and his arms were folded across his chest as he tried to pour all of his loathing for Sasuke into a single gaze.

_If looks could kill… _Sakura thought; she would have smiled, but even the fact that Naruto was just _reacting _to Sasuke's mere _presence_ was heart-breaking. She let out an involuntary whimper as she took it all in: Sasuke's childish frown; Naruto's toothy grimace; and her own happy, oblivious smile. Even Kakashi was smiling in the picture, which was more than could usually be said for him; his hands were placed on Naruto's and Sasuke's heads in a fatherly sort of way and his eye was crinkled into a smile that was almost a laugh.

She sniffled. They were all so _happy_. And yet… it had all been destroyed. Just like _that_.

Well… perhaps it hadn't been so sudden. Looking back, Sakura cursed herself for the millionth time; why hadn't they noticed that Sasuke was so power-hungry? Surely they had noticed the signs, for there had been plenty of signs… Wasn't their first clue when he told them straight off that his ambition was to kill a certain man? Why hadn't they _done_ something?

The questions chased each other around Sakura's head but, as always, there was no end in sight. They raced around in circles, mocking her for her own obliviousness… her own _naivety_.

But she couldn't keep doing this… not now, when she was already so angry. What she needed was some… some _interaction_. Female interaction, of course; she had had enough of the other half of the population to last her a lifetime.

She slipped off of her bed and into her sandals. She hesitated before tearing a piece of paper out of her unused diary; wasn't it part of the agreement that he shouldn't be bothered if she doesn't tell him where she's going? She pondered this for a moment but quickly decided that his reaction would be worth it. Smirking, she scribbled a note onto the scrap before dropping it onto her bed. She then propped open the window and slid out of it, landing on the roof and shutting the window soundlessly behind her.

(…)

Having already partaken in the customary self-loathing that came after every fight or flashback Kakashi had, he deemed the time elapsed since his argument with Sakura enough for her to vent her anger into some passionate pillow-punching (an act he encouraged much more than Kakashi-punching). Groaning as he always did when made to remove himself from the comfort of his own bed, he shuffled lazily over to his bedroom door. He fumbled with the lock for a moment before pushing the door open and making his way over to Sakura's bedroom. The door was still closed, as was to be expected. He took a deep, readying breath and knocked twice, calling out, "Sakura?"

Unsurprisingly, there was no response. Less predictably, though, he could hear no crying. He pressed his ear against the door but picked up no sound.

"Sakura?"

Concerned, he tried to detect her chakra. Nothing. His eye widened as he realized what had happened.

He kicked open the door angrily to find an empty bed. He strode over to it, snatching up the torn piece of paper lying discarded on top of it.

_Kakashi_

_Ran away from home. If you come after me, it'll only prove my point._

_Sakura_

Needless to say, the frustrated scream that followed could be heard throughout the entire apartment complex as Kakashi crushed the note in his palm.

Somewhere on a lonely street near the Yamanaka Flower Shop, Hanano Sakura was grinning.


	5. Understanding

Author's Note: Sorry for the delay; I actually did start working on this awhile back now, but unforseen personal complications took precedence over the completion of this chapter. Sorry about that! And sorry for any cheesiness... I always write such sappy things! Gah! On the bright side, my birthday's on Sunday! I'm turning fourteen! Yay!

* * *

The rain had cleared by the time Sakura reached the flower shop; the windowpanes were streaked with the trails left behind. The familiar jingling of bells rang in her ears as she pushed the door open.

A smile danced across her face as she inhaled deeply, drinking in the sweet scents of the flowers. She was surrounded by an array of brightly colored plants, all welcoming her into the shop.

"Sakura?"

A tall blonde girl with pale blue eyes pushed past a hanging plant, an eyebrow quirked in surprise. She blinked once before crossing her arms and glaring at Sakura.

"Where have you been, huh?" she demanded. "I haven't talked with you in ages, have you been ignoring me or something?"

Sakura shrugged noncommittally. In truth, she had been avoiding Ino since Sasuke's death. Everything about Ino reminded Sakura of Sasuke, so being near Ino certainly wouldn't have done anything to help her recovery.

"I've been busy," she said vaguely, stopping to touch a rose petal. She smiled faintly as its delicate scent reached her nose. The edges of her mouth dipped into a frown, however, as she looked back at Ino.

"You're not one to talk, though," she argued, putting her hands on her hips. "You haven't come to visit me either." She stuck out her tongue at Ino, tugging down an eyelid with a finger.

Expecting Ino to return that with a similarly childish gesture, she was surprised to see that her face fell and she looked nervously down at the ground, gripping her elbow loosely. "Yeah, well…" her voice trailed off, leaving an uncomfortable silence hanging in the air.

Sakura's arms fell to her sides as she cocked her head, frowning at Ino.

"Something wrong?" She asked the question but she knew the answer; it was undoubtedly the same reason she had been avoiding Ino.

The blond bit her lip and rubbed her elbow, still giving herself a one-armed hug. "Uh… nothing," she said quickly, folding her arms across her apron and raising an eyebrow at Sakura. "So anyway, what're you here for?"

"Do I need an excuse to visit you?" The retort was an automatic response, but both girls knew that there was more to Sakura's visit than just a friendly hello.

Ino snorted in disbelief. "Oh, come on, Sakura," she scoffed. "I'm not _that _dumb, you know. Just because I don't have a genius for a shishou or a father or a boyfriend—"

Ino was cut off sharply by an instinctive growl from Sakura. Her mouth froze in a little "o" as her eyes widened, her eyebrows disappearing into her hairline. Sakura was scowling at her finger, having just pricked it on a thorn. Ino's expression softened as she watched Sakura's lip tremble; clearly, she had hit a sore spot.

"What's up?" She crossed the room quickly, stopping in front of Sakura. When Sakura didn't show any sign she'd heard, Ino waved a hand in front of her blank face.

"Heell-ooo," she sang, snapping her fingers. "Wake up, princess, I know something's wrong."

Sakura did not move for a second. Then, slowly, majestically, she folded her arms across her chest and glared supremely at Ino.

"Who said anything was wrong?"

Ino tutted impatiently.

"I already told you, I ain't that stupid," she said stubbornly, waving a finger in front of Sakura's face. "Now, which one of them is it? Tsunade or—"

"It's not Tsunade," Sakura snapped; Ino looked up at her, surprised by her briskness.

"Well then, who is it?"

At first, Sakura said nothing, only turning her head to the side and glaring angrily at a display of carnations. Finally, after a long, pregnant pause, she muttered, "Both of them."

Ino took a deep breath, letting her shoulders relax. _Ouch. Double whammy._

"Wanna come upstairs?" Sakura turned to see her pointing to the open door behind the counter. She knew that it led to a staircase, which in turn led to the Yamanaka residence above the shop. Sakura hesitated in accepting, but Ino's warm smile eventually convinced her.

"Fine," she said grudgingly, and she followed stiffly as Ino led her upstairs. They went straight to the kitchen, which was quite pretty. Everything was flawlessly color-coordinated; the Yamanakas were very conscious of that sort of thing. It was a small room but wasn't at all cluttered. _Unlike our kitchen at home, _Sakura thought immediately. Thinking of home, however, made her think of Kakashi, which made her think of Shikamaru, which inevitably led to her thinking about the boy she had come here to talk about in the first place.

"Sit," Ino commanded, gesturing to the wooden table in the center of the kitchen. Sakura obeyed; she had been in here too many times to feel uncomfortable, even if the last time she'd sat here had been so many years ago… _Too many years ago, _she thought, watching quietly as Ino fixed them some tea.

"There we go," she said, setting a steaming cup of tea in front of Sakura. "Now," she said promptly, seating herself across from Sakura and leaning across the table. "Talk to me, girl."

Sakura feigned a pout, but Ino's serious expression did not yield. She sighed, shaking her head. "Somebody's serious these days," she commented, blocking out the voice saying, _"You're stalling."_

Ino shrugged, her expression apathetic. "Things change," she said, dismissing Sakura's statement with a wave of the hand. "People change. Anyway," she said pointedly, pointing a spoon at Sakura, "which would you like to start with? Tight-ass father or lazy-ass boyfriend?"

Sakura snorted. "Shikamaru," she laughed, "is no longer my boyfriend."

Ino sighed. "What did the idiot do _this_time?"

"Oh, nothing," Sakura said airily. "Just insulted me and everything I've ever stood for." Her voice was dripping with sarcasm.

Sakura fully expected an exasperated sigh in response. She was therefore surprised to see Ino rest her folded arms on the table and lean across it, a completely serious look on her face.

"Sakura…"

Sakura was almost shocked at how quiet and subdued she sounded.

"… Did he mention… Sasuke?"

Sakura shot out of her chair like a bullet, her back stiff and straight. Her face was livid, her nostrils flaring regally.

"Don't—"

Ino interrupted her by rising to her feet as well, her palms pressed against the wood of the table. Her cup of tea tipped and cracked on the table, spilling its warm contents.

"Sakura!" she said loudly, cutting Sakura off sharply. Mouth still open, Sakura looked at Ino with a frozen expression of anger on her face. "Sasuke was important to me too, but we wouldn't get anywhere if we exploded whenever we heard his name, would we?"

There was silence between them as both heaved heavy breaths, their faces flushed with emotion. Both girls had hot tears sparkling in their eyes, but neither let them fall. Sakura angrily wiped at her eyes with the heel of her hand, sitting down. She glared at the table, her cheeks still pink.

Ino hesitated, watching her stare down her cup of tea. "Sakura…" she offered more kindly. Sakura did not budge. Sighing, Ino walked over to the sink and grabbed the sponge and garbage can. She swept the remains of her mug into the can and began to scrub at the stain in the table.

"Anyway, what did Shikamaru do?"

Sakura raised her chin, leaning back and rocking in her chair.

"He dumped me," she said shortly, "for Kurenai."

Ino's jaw dropped as she froze in mid-scrub, staring wide-eyed at Sakura.

"_What_? You mean, as in, he _likes _her—?"

"Who knows," Sakura said angrily. "He just said he had 'a lot on his plate' and mentioned how he had swore to help her out with the baby—"

"Well, he did," Ino said matter-of-factly. Sakura blinked.

"So?" she said, eyebrow raised. "By being my boyfriend, isn't he obligated to help me too?"

Ino sucked thoughtfully on her cheek, her scrubbing slow. When she spoke, it was slowly and with caution.

"Well… Shikamaru promised Asuma-sensei he'd take care of Kurenai, didn't he?"

Sakura blinked again before creasing her forehead in a frown. _So Ino's siding with him, huh?_

"Why can't he do both?"

Ino frowned. She put a hand on her hip, still holding onto the wet sponge.

"Well… I guess his promise to Asuma weighs more in his mind than any promises you think he may have made to you."

Sakura narrowed her eyes at that. "But he promised me he'd take care of me!" she said angrily. "He promised me that!"

"Well, Sakura, no offense, but I think Asuma might mean more to him than you do," she said, wincing at the harshness of her own words.

"But we're going out!" Sakura shouted defensively.

"_Were_going out," Ino said sharply, pointing the dripping sponge at Sakura. "And now you're not, because he figured out he has different priorities."

Shocked, Sakura gaped at Ino. "Ino, how could you side with him?" she said indignantly.

"I'm not siding with him, Sakura, I'm just showing you that there's a different side of the story—"

"_I'm not siding with anyone, I'm simply reminding you that your side of the story isn't the only one—" _

Sakura gasped. Ino had said almost exactly what Kakashi had said to her; outraged, she rose again. Desperate to defend herself, she screamed at Ino from across the table.

"He told me that I didn't really love Sasuke!"

The outburst rang in their ears for several agonizingly long moments as both girls blinked. Sakura's chest was rising and falling as pearly tears rolled down her face. Ino's lips were parted, her eyes wide as she looked at Sakura. Finally, she broke the silence.

"He_said _that?" she asked incredulously.

Sakura nodded mutely, biting down on her lip.

Ino put both hands on her hips. Her brow furrowed as the look of stunned disbelief melted into a frown. She clucked her tongue once, turning her head slightly to the side.

"Well… I'm sure he didn't mean it…"

Sakura immediately fired up again.

"You think he didn't _mean _it? He said he thought he was just a replacement for Sasuke, of course he meant it—"

"Well, was he?"

Stunned, Sakura gaped wordlessly at Ino; she had no answer for this. Inwardly, she chastised herself. _Don't be stupid… you know the answer; you just don't want to admit it._

Ino waited patiently for Sakura's response. She didn't mean to hurt Sakura with the frankness of her words, but she thought that, in the long run, it would do Sakura good. She was a ridiculously headstrong individual with a fiery spirit that it seemed no one could break. Ino knew better; Sakura was tough, but like anyone, even she had things that would make her break down and cry. That thing was a person for her: Sasuke.

Although it was more of an infatuation, Ino had claimed to love Sasuke just as much as Sakura had. Sakura, of course, had more credential for her alleged romance; she and Sasuke at least saw each other and spoke on a regular basis, even if all that really accomplished was giving Sasuke more opportunities to reject Sakura's advances. Still, Ino's life had revolved around Sasuke for so long that she felt almost as heart-wrenchingly devastated when Sasuke died. She had sobbed for days and days; no one could console her. All of the Rookie Nine had probably cried; Sasuke was the first of their comrades to fall. In the end, though, there were two people who managed to convince her to smile again: Chouji and Shikamaru, her beloved teammates. They helped her back onto her feet and reminded her that although it was terrible, life would move on. With their help, she was able to find some sort of closure, accept and move on.

Sakura, however, had found no such closure. She had started by shutting herself off from everyone: her friends, teammates, and family. People were always offering their condolences and Sakura would just nod mutely, her once lively face expressionless. She would fake smiles and assure well-wishers that she was doing fine, thank you, while inside her heart was breaking even more. She had eventually tried to reach out to someone not as intricately connected to Sasuke as Kakashi or Sasuke or even Ino herself; rather, she clung to Shikamaru for support. While it was sweet to see Sakura act happy for once, even that was a façade; ultimately, the couple met its inevitable rocky doom.

Although she claimed impartiality, Ino was really torn between whom to internally side with. On the one hand, Sakura had been her best friend (and rival) since they were small girls; she had sworn to protect and defend Sakura through thick and thin. But on the other side of the dispute was Shikamaru, and she had sworn loyalty to him as well; he was a teammate she loved so deeply to that she felt obliged to immediately rise to his defense. She knew that Sakura was hurting, but she thought Sakura was ignorant to the pain Shikamaru was going through.

"Yes…" Sakura's words snapped Ino out of her reverie. She had whispered them as if she were ashamed to be saying them, and Ino felt a stab to her heart as she noticed Sakura's angry blush. Swallowing her guilt, she took a deep breath and spoke again.

"Sakura," she said kindly, and Sakura looked up with hopeful eyes. "I know Shikamaru better than I know almost anyone. For a genius, he can say some pretty stupid things, but he really doesn't mean them. I mean…" She crossed her arms across her chest, gazing thoughtfully at the wall behind Sakura. "I know you'll hate to hear this, but Shikamaru really _is _going through a lot right now. Even though he would never admit it, he really idolized Asuma, you know?" Sakura nodded. "And Asuma died and left behind a distraught wife and an unborn baby. Even if Shikamaru _hadn't _promised Asuma-sensei to look after the kid, he would've still felt indebted to it anyway." She frowned, and her voice grew quieter. "No matter what anyone tries to tell him, Shikamaru's always going to think that Asuma's death is his fault… just like he thinks Sasuke running away is his fault."

Sakura's eyes widened.

"What? How could that be his…?" Her voice trailed off as she recalled that it had been Shikamaru who led the failed Sasuke Retrieval mission. Her eyes flickered downwards as she hung her head. _I had forgotten that…_ She gulped before raising her head again.

"I'm sorry," she murmured.

Ino shook her head. "There's nothing to apologize to me for. And," she added hastily, waving her hands in the air, "I'm not saying that Shikamaru hasn't been stupid either. He was just pissed so he said some stupid stuff that he knew would upset you, you know? Just like you probably said some angry things to him that you didn't really mean."

Sakura said nothing; there was no need to.

Placing the sponge down on the table, Ino crossed the room and crouched down next to Sakura. Her face was blank as she wrapped her arms tightly around Sakura, embracing the person she held dearest in the world. At first Sakura stiffened at the contact, but she quickly gave into the hug, burying her face in the crook of Ino's neck and crying. Ino cooed softly as she rubbed her hand up and down Sakura's neck and back, whispering soothing words of comfort into her ear.

Sakura cried for a few minutes before her sobs receded into sniffles. She could feel the vibrations within Ino's chest as the blond girl chuckled.

"Way to go, forehead, you got your snot all over my favorite shirt."

Sakura growled as Ino laughed, pulling herself off of Sakura and smiling fondly.

"There we go, forehead," she joked. "That ought to have cleared your head a little, huh?"

Sakura nodded sheepishly. Ino smirked and stood up, strutting back over to her seat out of habit.

"Who're you trying to impress with that one, pig?" Sakura said playfully. Ino growled as Sakura had, turning on her heel to glare at the pink-haired girl. Sparks flew between them before they both couldn't help themselves and laughed good-naturedly.

"But seriously, Sakura," Ino said eventually, "Shikamaru's a boy, okay? So don't take him too seriously, 'cause boys are always stupid."

Sakura grinned.

"Great advice," she said sarcastically. "Like I couldn't have figured that out by myself." Sakura pushed her chair away from the table and stood up, the sound of the wood scraping against the floor drowning out Ino's indignant snort.

"I'll see you later, Ino," she said, waving a hand in farewell. Ino was shaking her head but waved back.

When Sakura reached the door at the foot of the staircase, however, she stopped. She noticed that there were irises lining the railing of the staircase. _Now, what was it that Suzume-sensei had said about irises…?_

"_Irises are named after the rainbow and accordingly come in a wide variety of colors. They have been a favorite flower of storytellers for centuries, often representing a message to be sent or a cherished friendship."_

A cherished friendship… Filled with sudden warmth, Sakura turned to Ino and smiled.

"And Ino…" she began tentatively, embarrassed, "…thanks."

Surprised, Ino's eyes widened before her expression softened into a smile. She opened her mouth to speak but found she had no parting words to give. That would have sounded corny anyway, and Ino couldn't stand cheesy farewells. Instead, she just waved Sakura on with a hand, urging her to leave the kitchen before there was a chance for an awkward silence to occur. Sakura complied and left, still smiling long after she had closed the door of the flower shop behind her.


	6. Reconciliation

Author's Note: Aaaand… more contemplation. Hurrah. Whoop de FRICKIN' doo. Let's get to some action and romance already! Agh, but first we have to get through all of THIS stuff, nn… Ah well. 'S not _all_ reflection. Happy Boxing Day.

* * *

Cotton balls floated across the sky as a certain lazy teenager kicked back in his favorite spot, watching them drift past as he relaxed. This was where he had always come to calm down; nothing relaxed him so much as cloud-gazing. Here, he could slowly detach himself from his troubles and watch as they drifted idly past, floating away with the clouds… 

Today, however, he found that he was having difficulty detaching himself from anything at all. Nara Shikamaru was wearing a scowl where there was usually an apathetic frown, glaring at his fluffy white friends._ Look at them, _he thought moodily, _floating around as if they don't have a trouble in the world. "Oh look, I'm a cloud, I don't have any problems and you do, ha ha." Pfft… They're mocking me, that's what they're doing._

Grumbling to himself, he rolled over onto his stomach.

_Maybe the wood has something more interesting to say._

But the wooden wall of the small, sheltered area in which Shikamaru was located was doing nothing to ease his annoyance; on the contrary, it irked him further. _And the wood, too, it doesn't do anything… it just sits there and lets things walk all over it… literally._

He blinked, contemplating that thought.

_Is that what I'm becoming? _he wondered dimly, flipping back onto his back and sighing with the relief of abdominal pressure. _A wall that just stands there and lets anyone walk over it?_

Again he sighed, this time with exasperation.

_No…_he thought, his face melting into its usual bored expression. _Then I wouldn't have broken up with Sakura… Hmmm… _His brow furrowed as he considered the pink-haired female. Sakura had never been a big part of his life; she was just that annoying groupie who had some complicated rivalry with his equally obnoxious teammate. When Sasuke had left the village, she had graduated to the weepy teammate. It wasn't until Naruto left and she started training under Tsunade that it became worthwhile knowing Sakura; she had become quite the powerhouse. She still could and would talk a mile a minute, but she finally was able to back up her big words with almost perfect chakra control and monstrous strength.

And then, of course, in spite of all their efforts, Sasuke had died and Sakura had become inconsolable. Shikamaru was shocked when she came to him for comfort; he and Chouji and Kiba had put their money on her going to Naruto, if anyone. But she had bypassed any likelier candidates and made a beeline for Shikamaru, seeking him out almost immediately after the initial mourning. They had had fun together, of course, and Shikamaru liked her just as much as the next guy, but he found himself unable to commit to someone like Sakura. Women had always baffled him, and frankly, at this time in his life, he didn't need any extra confusion. Consequently, he had taken what seemed to him to be the most logical step and dropped the extra emotional baggage so that he could direct his energy towards the biggest hurdles facing him: Kurenai and her baby.

He did feel bad for bringing up Sasuke to Sakura, but in his defense he thought he could've been a lot nastier about it. He had had a nagging feeling from the start that Sakura was in some warped rebound mode (regardless of the fact that Sasuke had never loved her) and was craving someone to fill the void in her heart that had always been there but she had never noticed before then. He figured that Naruto would have been too close to home for her; Sasuke's death would have affected him just as much as her, if not more, and she wanted to get away from that emotional stress.

Shikamaru chuckled darkly to himself. He had been smart enough to skip that step after Asuma died; he and Chouji and Ino had all banded together after the death, looking out for and helping each other. He supposed, though, that his team was a lot less dysfunctional than Sakura's, and he couldn't really blame her for seeking solace in less familiar territory.

The sound of approaching footsteps interrupted his long-winded train of thought. _Maybe it's for the better_, he thought dully, blinking slowly and yawning. _Thinking too hard is bad for your skin… or something…_

He shut his eyes in concentration, trying to recall where he had heard that before. He was so busy trying to remember that he temporarily forgot about the person walking towards him. He was reminded when he heard the offender stop and tap his or her foot impatiently.

_Hmm… irritated foot-tapping… I'll hazard a guess at female. _

"Shikamaru?"

_Affirmative… no… that sounds too weird… we'll go for an… ah…_

"Shikamaru?"

_Come on now… on the tip of my tongue…_

"Shikamaru!"

Shikamaru slowly opened his eyes, yawning again and feigning surprise.

"Hn?" he said, rubbing at one of his eyes. "I'm sorry, I was sleeping." His response was met with an impatient tut as he straightened up, stretching his arms far above his head. Finally, once he had rotated his shoulders and rubbed tiny tears from his eyes, he turned to face the disturber of the peace. His eyes widened in shock as he took in the girl's soft pink hair and emerald eyes.

"Sakura?" For all the world he looked casual, but his insides were squirming uncomfortably. _Damn… why do women always have to come back for a second round?_

Under different circumstances, Sakura would have rolled her eyes; that was what she had planned to do, at any rate. Now that she was here, however, with her lips parted and her eyes wide, she wasn't sure what to say. It had made so much sense as she was walking here; confronting Shikamaru seemed the logical thing to do. And she _did_ have a lot of things she wanted to say to him, didn't she? That's why she had come in the first place, wasn't it?

Shikamaru was sitting up where she knew she'd find him, watching the clouds as if he didn't have a trouble in the world. She had always thought he did it because he wanted something to look at while being generally lazy, but her conversation with Ino had spurred the wheels into motion inside her head and it was dawning on her that maybe it was something more. One of his eyebrows was piqued in curiosity.

"I take it you're not used to being interrupted?" she asked, a smirk playing at her lips. Shikamaru blinked once before shaking his head slowly. His expression did not change.

_Going to be difficult about this, huh? _Sighing lightly, Sakura shifted her weight from foot to foot. Her arms were crossed across her chest and her head was turned to the side. The eye Shikamaru could see was narrowed; she seemed to be glaring at a nearby rooftop.

"Er…" he ventured, causing her to turn to face him. She looked expectant, and Shikamaru found himself cursing his loss for words. _Women and their expectations… nothing's ever good enough…_

She blinked and he directed his wandering attention back onto her. He coughed before trying again. "Er… why are you here?" It was blunt and even rather rude, but beating around the bush had never served Shikamaru well.

Sakura was not perturbed by his forwardness.

"To talk to you," she stated simply.

Silence hung between them as either waited for the other to elaborate. Sakura eventually broke it, clearing her throat.

"I was just talking to Ino," she explained. "And she… well, she said a lot of things." It was a statement, and Shikamaru saw no reason to answer it; he waited patiently for her to continue.

Sakura coughed uncomfortably. As she continued, her words spilled out unevenly; "I wanted to say that I'm sorry."

A sigh escaped Shikamaru's lips. He took a deep breath, rubbing his forehead with the palm of his hand.

_Honestly, don't be so surprised…_ he told himself._ What else could she have come here for? _Regardless, he was still taken aback by her abruptness. He had expected a long, drawn-out speech about how they each had their problems but why couldn't they understand each other, if only just a little… as he saw it, it was the standard female response to a break-up. Of course, Sakura had never fit very neatly into the category of 'standard female'.

"Well then…" he exhaled slowly, his eyes directed at the sky as if seeking solace from the clouds. He stared up at them for an indeterminable amount of time before his eyes swiveled back onto Sakura. "I'm sorry too."

Sakura responded with another deep breath. "That's… that's good," she said stiffly. Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. _Arrogant much?_ He chased the thought away, folding his arms as she had done.

"Glad you think so." If Asuma had taught him anything, it was to always have a sharp response— especially when dealing with one of the female persuasion.

Sakura had to fight the smile tugging at her mouth. If Tsunade had taught her anything, it was never to let the man know you thought him _funny_. "Does wonders to his ego," she would say.

"Well then, if that's all, I'll be on my way." Although she had already been standing, she seemed to jump to her feet.

Shikamaru gaped wordlessly, shocked by the brevity of their encounter. _That's it? _he mused. _An apology and good-bye? Closure, my ass…_

His lack of response was met with a prolonged gaze on Sakura's part; Shikamaru quickly deemed it unfathomable and therefore didn't bother trying to decipher it. The wetness of her eyes, however, was not lost on him; it pulled the edges of his lips into a frown and he narrowed his eyes.

"You sure you're all right?" he asked, concern evident in his usually emotionless voice. "You do know that I didn't mean those things I said about Sasuke, don't you?" His own question surprised him; since when was he the one to drag up grievances after the other party had addressed and dismissed them?

Sakura was a little stunned, but she couldn't say she was surprised. In her experience, men had no sense of tact whatsoever when it came to these things. She blinked and considered him before responding. Snatches of phrases Ino had said to her floated through her mind; after their little discussion, she had a lot more thorough understanding of the man (hardly a boy) sitting before her.

"Yeah," she said. "I know." He looked doubtful, so she flashed him a reassuring smile. She waved, blew him a kiss, and disappeared in a flurry of swirling pink petals.

Bemused, Shikamaru blinked and blinked again. He stared at the spot she had disappeared from for what probably amounted to several minutes. Eventually, he shrugged, yawned, and lay back down.

_Women._

(…)

Elsewhere, Kakashi was at a bit of a standstill. After crumpling up the letter and allowing himself a nice scream (it was always fun to rile up the neighbors), he was weighing the possibilities. In a worst-case scenario, Sakura had been kidnapped and forced to write a farewell note. He flattened out the note and scanned it over, checking to see if there were any irregularities in her letter formation. Her hand didn't appear to have been shaky, but the note was hastily written; it was more of a scribble than her usual neat, loopy letters. It was undeniably her handwriting, of course, but it appeared more casual than he was used to seeing. If she had been kidnapped, what would be the point of leaving a note? To lure him away from his home? He reread the message.

_Kakashi_

_Ran away from home. If you come after me, it'll only prove my point._

_Sakura_

As he was re-reading the note, it occurred to him that he would have noticed it if someone had broken into his apartment. There would have been a much greater struggle; after all, Sakura wasn't exactly a pushover. He shook his head, marveling at how long it took him to remember that. _Maybe I really am getting old…_ Having safely ruled out the possibility of abduction, he examined the other options.

He observed Sakura's bedroom carefully; nothing seemed to be out of place. She had not taken anything with her and, after a quick examination of the bathroom, he determined that she hadn't taken any of her personal items either. Clearly, she had not run away from home— or if she had, she would certainly be coming back. As for last line of the note, he wrote it off as a juvenile attempt to annoy him. It had elicited a frustrated shout, but he had been meaning to do that soon anyway. In short, this 'disappearance' of Sakura's wasn't that big of a threat. Her absence wasn't an inconvenience to him; he actually didn't mind. He hoped that wherever she was going would help her to clear her head. If he crossed his fingers she might even come back ready to apologize to him. He laughed off the thought and went to relax on the couch.

"Where'd Sakura go?" Pakkun asked, dutifully crawling out from his spot underneath the sofa. He wiggled his bottom and leaped onto Kakashi's lap, lapping his master's face as Kakashi scratched him behind the ears. Kakashi answered him with a shrug.

"Who knows," he said as Pakkun crawled onto Kakashi's shoulder. "Hopefully nowhere dangerous."

"You sound awfully nonchalant about this," Pakkun said gruffly, sniffing Kakashi's hair absently.

"If you're that worried you can go out and look for her," Kakashi said. He reached over to the bookshelf and pulled out one of his beloved orange books, flipping open to a random page and starting to read. A disgruntled Pakkun removed himself from Kakashi's shoulder and trotted over to the doorway.

"I've been meaning to get a walk at any rate," he called to an unresponsive Kakashi. Muttering something about ungrateful humans, he pushed open the door and waddled out. It swung to a halt behind him, slightly ajar. Unperturbed, Kakashi turned the pages of his 'adult literature', giggling out of habit.

(…)

Sakura reappeared at the base of the building she had been on top of._ "Sometimes it's all about the appearance," _Tsunade had told her once. _"Dazzle the men and leave them senseless." _Sakura snorted; judging by the staggering proportions of certain parts of her mentor's body and the effect they generally had on men, Tsunade lived her life by this creed.

She began to walk down the dirt road, weaving her way through the maze of muddy puddles. The sun warmed her back and spurred her on, encouraging her to pursue the much more difficult and delicate task that lay ahead of her. In all of her anger at Shikamaru and angst over Sasuke, she had temporarily pushed the fight with her father out of her mind. Now that the Shikamaru business had been dealt with and Ino's words about Sasuke were still echoing in the back of her mind, she revisited the argument and didn't like what she found. Looking back, she found her own behavior predictable, impulsive, and stupid. _Here I am, parading around and thinking I've matured so much— then I just _had_ to go and get into an argument with him when he was just trying to help me and make a complete idiot out of myself._

_He was intruding! _a part of her argued. _It was none of his business!_

_Of_ course _it was his business! _Sakura retorted. _I'm his daughter, dammit, so it sure as hell _better_ be his business!_

The other part of her grumbled something before falling quiet. A wry smile curved Sakura's lips; perhaps this whole ordeal had matured her. After all, while it was true that in many aspects she had matured, when her temper rose past boiling point she was still unreasonable and shortsighted. Hopefully, this down point in her life was at an end and things would start to look up for her. Like Naruto, she could start to focus on controlling her anger as she had so painstakingly worked on controlling her chakra.

A cry of surprise escaped her lips as she nearly tripped over something soggy. Hopping on one foot to regain her balance, she peered behind her to see what she had hit. She gasped as she saw a squat brown dog lying facedown in a large puddle.

"Pakkun!" She squatted down next to Pakkun, placing her hands underneath his armpits and lifting him up to face her. Brown water was dripping off of his face, his half-lidded eyes red and strained.

"S-Sakura?" he spluttered; she flinched as some of the dirty water hit her face.

"No," she drawled sarcastically. "I'm just some other pink-haired girl who happens to actually want to rescue something like you." There was a bored but sour expression on her face as she dumped the dog onto dry ground. She took a step back as he shook himself dry, spraying water everywhere.

"Very clever," growled Pakkun, turning to face her. He raised one of his hind legs to scratch himself behind the ear, fixing Sakura with his usual grumpy glare. "I've been looking for you, you know," he said.

Sakura's eyebrows flew up in surprise.

"_Really?_" she asked incredulously. "Kakashi sent you looking for me?"

Pakkun shook his head, sending droplets of water flying. "No," he said with a sigh. "Here you could've been kidnapped and he just wanted to sit down and read his porn."

"You guys thought I was kidnapped?" Sakura's expression did not change.

Pakkun looked around shiftily.

"Well, he didn't," he said slowly, "but I did, Sakura! I went out to look for you!"

Sakura sighed. "I just wanted to leave to clear my head for awhile," she said exasperatedly. "All I did was go talk to some people."

Always eager for gossip, Pakkun perked up immediately. "Oooh, who did you talk to?"

"None of your business," Sakura said lightly, starting to walk away.

"Hey hey hey, wait up!" Pakkun jogged to catch up with her and continued to trot alongside her. Not being a dog of many words, he didn't say much. _Knowing Sakura, she's bound to break the silence eventually…_

"Anything interesting happen while I was gone?" she asked, feigning innocent curiosity. She figured Pakkun would crack and start bothering her eventually if the silence kept up, so she made sure to start conversation on her terms.

The dog grinned to himself. _Heh, walked right into that one._

"None of your business," he trilled, his attempt at a feminine voice scaring a passing child. He chuckled darkly to himself. _Third one this week…_

Sakura sighed; she was too drained to try to mask her reaction. _There's been enough of that going on, _she thought irritably.

"I was talking to Ino," she said, deciding to supply Pakkun with partial information. After all, how was he to know she was concealing some of the truth?

"Funny," Pakkun said casually, sniffing the air innocently. "You smell an awful lot like that Nara boy."

Sakura's nostrils flared. _Damn dog… _"Oh do I now?"

Pakkun nodded. "Yep." He grinned crookedly up at Sakura.

Sakura sighed. "Whatever happened to being a loyal companion?" she asked jokingly, nudging the dog playfully with her toe.

"Ha!" Pakkun's laugh was more of a bark. "You didn't sign any blood contract, girly! I answer to one master and one master alone!" Sakura shook her head as he cackled to himself.

"Blood relative should count for something, shouldn't it?" For a distraction from her thoughts, their conversation was dancing dangerously close to the topic of Kakashi.

Pakkun smacked his lips thoughtfully. "Hrm… let's see here…" He pretended to consider her question before shaking his head. "Nope. Nothing in the rules about that." The remainder of their walk was carried out in silence, Sakura staring blankly ahead and Pakkun smiling smugly, enjoying the silence he had won. _Too easy. _

(…)

A metallic click interrupted Kakashi's wandering thoughts. He ignored it, flipping a page in his book as he pretended to read. The door creaked open and Sakura walked in, followed by Pakkun at her heels.

"You found each other?" He sounded mildly interested but did not look up. Out of habit, he had to feign engrossment in his book. After all, he had to diligently practice for meetings and conversations with Gai.

"She stepped on me," Pakkun said, sounding hurt. He waddled over to Kakashi, hopping up onto his lap. Wrinkling his nose, he peered disgustedly over the pages of his book.

"And you're dripping on me." He pushed Pakkun off his knees, letting the pug sink into the couch cushion beside him. Grumbling mutinously, Pakkun crawled off the couch to settle underneath it. Kakashi sighed, turning a page in his book. "How was your little excursion out?" he asked Sakura, still appearing to be focusing solely on the words on the page.

Sakura did not answer, crossing her arms and shifting her weight from foot to foot. Sensing her hesitation, Kakashi looked up, directing his one-eyed gaze at her. His Sharingan was screwed shut as opposed to covered, which limited the range of looks he could give. He waited patiently, knowing how important it was to let her take the initiative at this point.

"Um… Dad?" She was looking to the side, her face scrunched.

_Addressed me as her father, that's a good sign._ "Yes?" He decided to show more enthusiasm than usual.

There was more uncomfortable silence as Sakura summoned the words she needed to say.

"I'm sorry."

Kakashi's mild expression lingered before his eye curved into a smile.

"It's all right," he said.

Sakura raised an eyebrow. _Okay, that was way too easy… _Short exchanges with Shikamaru she could take, having had the real emotional closure with Ino, but she was expecting a little more here.

"Really?"_ Ooh, maybe I could've made that sound less skeptical…_

Kakashi's smile faded back into his usual relatively apathetic expression. "Mm-hm." He blinked; Sakura still looked unconvinced.

"Ah…" His eye swiveled to the side as he observed the wall. "I had issues with… well… when I was your age, I wasn't very stable, so…" His eye returned to settle on her, his head slightly cocked. "I know you might hate me for saying this, but I do understand where you're coming from."

"Yeah, he got royally pissed whenever someone tried to intrude upon his grieving, even if he had dumped himself in that person's apartment." Pakkun's head was poking out from underneath the sofa as he offered his own two cents. Kakashi leaned forward to frown at Pakkun. The dog felt the annoyed glare on the back of his neck but pretended not to. "Compared to Angsty Boy over here, you were practically diplomatic." His dry laughter was loud and raucous, interrupted by wheezes as he coughed on some dust.

"That'll be enough from you, Pakkun," Kakashi said lightly, digging his toe into the dog's side. Pakkun scowled, dragging himself out from his spot under the couch and heading towards the kitchen. He muttered something along the lines of, "Just trying to help" before disappearing behind a counter.

Kakashi stood up, brushing off his pant legs. He also murmured something irritably; Sakura thought she could make out the words "ungrateful mutt". She smiled, hands on her hips.

"Look at you two, bickering like an old married couple," she said. Her smile transformed into a smirk as Kakashi shot her an unamused glare, shoving his book into its place on the shelf roughly.

"Ha. Ha." His humorless response only delighted Sakura even more. She pushed out her bottom lip in a mock pout.

"Aww, shall I fetch the divorce papers?" she asked. "After all, we can't have you paired with someone who has the nerve to talk back to you, can we?" Kakashi began walking away, raising his hand as if in salutation. It took Sakura a moment to realize that he was flipping her off.

Her cheeks flushed with anger. "SHANNARO!"

Pakkun took the pleading shouts and sounds of cracking plaster as reassurance. _How sweet, _he mused, munching happily on his doggy treats. _They're getting along so well._ A particularly nasty crack that sounded suspiciously like bone sent a shiver down his spine.

_Okay, so she still has to work on the temper thing._


	7. Flowers

Once the Sims 2 decided that my 1.0 GHz wasn't good enough for its prissy _system requirements _of 1.2 GHz, I started working on this again. Plus my health is declining Hooray? But now I'm officially a KakaSaku person. Not that there will be incest here. That would be nasty. Oh, Kakashi and Sakura don't know much about the Ten Commandments.

* * *

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

Kakashi groaned, squinting against the blinding fluorescent light. Almost immediately, the strong smell of cleaning liquids and medicinal solutions filled his nostrils. He wrinkled his nose in disgust. _Sterile environment… incessant beeping… white light burning through my eyelids…_ He groaned again, realizing that he was once more in the hospital.

Wondering what he had done to himself this time, he combed through various memories. _Sitting on the couch reading… Sakura comes home… hmm, Sakura… _Eyes still closed, he frowned. _Hadn't I… fought with her about something?_ He struggled to remember, racking his brains until the familiar shouts and angry words drifted to the forefront of his mind. _Ah, yes… she had been crying… and then… hmm… she left, didn't she? Yeah, and then she came home… _His eyes widened as he registered how he had had come to find himself here in the first place. Flashes of plaster breaking and angry punches flew through his mind as the scene slowly pieced itself together. _Sakura_ had beaten him into this condition only because he had, if memory served, flipped her off.

He gulped.

Nervously, he tested his extremities. He couldn't move the fingers on his right hand, let alone the rest of the arm; pain shot from his shoulder all the way down to the tip of his middle finger as he tried. His left arm seemed intact, or at least more so than its immobile counterpart. His legs gave only feeble responses to his attempts at moving them.

The worst came, however, when he tried to lift himself into a sitting position. His entire body seemed to scream in protest as pain seared through his chest, forcing him back down. His breath came in pants as the pain subsided, leaving him to lay flat lest it rear its ugly head again.

_Dammit, Sakura…_

He cracked open his right eye, muttering curses as it watered in response to the lights. _Why on earth do they need those godforsaken things anyway?_ He shifted his gaze lazily from left to right, taking in as much as he could from his limited position on the bed. There was a window on his right, the curtain fluttering slightly in the breeze. He shivered; although the sky outside was sunny, the draft was cold. He tried to make himself more comfortable, but he couldn't turn onto his side or stretch out and there was nothing he could do about the itchy hospital gown and stiff blanket. Sighing irritably, he resigned himself to waiting patiently for something more exciting to happen.

In an effort to relax, he closed his eyes and tried to loosen his muscles. He did the best he could to push his shoulders down, wincing as his right arm resisted. He tried to wipe his mind blank, attempting to achieve a blissful state. The repetitive beeping of whatever machine was plugged into him wasn't doing much to help, however; he growled at the annoying sound. _And people wonder why I hate hospitals…_

His mental mantra was interrupted by the sound of the door creaking open. He opened his eye in interest; there wasn't much more he could do. His fatigue was too great for him to sense the chakra patterns, but judging by the imposing _clack _of stiletto on tile he could make some assumptions.

"Milady?" He looked up at the blonde woman standing at his bedside, hands on her hips; or rather, he tried to, but was a little distracted by her — ah — assets, which were dangling dangerously close to his face. She cleared her throat, feeling his gaze and finding herself thoroughly unamused by it. He let his gaze linger momentarily before re-directing it to her face. Her disapproving frown did not surprise him; out of all the things he had been hospitalized for, this one was probably the most ridiculous.

Tsunade clicked her tongue.

"What are we going to do with you, Hatake?" She sighed heavily and pulled out a clipboard, flipping lazily to a page. "Beaten up by your own daughter…" She chuckled. "Looks like I taught that girl well, huh?"

Kakashi did not join in on her laughter.

Tsunade's smile faded. "Lighten up, Hatake," she scoffed.

He cleared his throat.

"With all due respect, milady, you're not the one strapped to a hospital bed."

Tsunade let out a little "humph" and jotted something down on her paper.

"All right, then, you clever bastard, let's get this over with." She pointed the ballpoint at him accusingly before returning to her documents.

"Now… unfortunately, your head is fine… No concussions or any sign of mental damage." She harrumphed in annoyance. "Pity, I was hoping it would knock some sense into you." She frowned and bit her lip, looking over the rest of the report. "You've suffered several broken bones, most notably two in your rib cage and most of the bones in your right arm and legs…" She smirked over the top of her clipboard. Kakashi raised an eyebrow in question.

"Yes, milady?"

Tsunade's sadistic grin was replaced by a deceptive expression of hurt innocence.

"Oh, it's nothing…" she said absently, scribbling something down. "I'm just afraid that your middle finger will never be quite the same… you'll notice its future performances will be lacking." She flashed him another evil smile and made a dramatic _tap_ on the clipboard.

Kakashi sighed.

"How long do I have to stay here?"

"Longer than you'd like."

Kakashi frowned.

"If I had a choice, I wouldn't be here at all."

Tsunade crossed her arms, exaggerating her cleavage even further and distracting Kakashi.

"Would you rather have me trust Sakura to heal your wounds?"

Kakashi snapped back into reality. He contemplated this before smiling at Tsunade.

"Thank you for your kind treatment."

Again, Tsunade merely let out a disgruntled sound before turning and walking away. Before she could exit, however, she ran into an incoming pink-haired visitor.

"Oh!" Both women let out cries of surprise. Tsunade immediately stepped back, bringing Sakura into plain view. The girl was rubbing her nose and biting her lip, looking up at her mentor apologetically.

"I'm so sorry, shishou," she said, stumbling over her words. Kakashi imagined the image of Tsunade standing there with her hands on her hips was pretty intimidating. "I didn't see you coming."

_How could you not? _Kakashi mused._ She's not that difficult to miss. _It occurred to him, however, that men might be more likely to notice Tsunade than women.

Tsunade waved her student's apology away.

"Doesn't matter," she said. "I did want to talk to you about _this, _though." She gestured with her clipboard at Kakashi's hospital bed. Sakura followed her movements and, when she made eye contact with Kakashi, adopted an even more apologetic look.

"Dad!" she exclaimed. "I—"

"Talk to him later," Tsunade snapped, and Sakura's eyes swiveled back onto Tsunade. The older woman sighed before regarding Sakura warily. "While I approve of your proactive approach to dealing with the aggressive or oppressive men in your life, I can't say I approve of_ this_." Again she made a reference to the hardly conscious Kakashi. "This man has had enough damage to his body and, while he deserved every last injury, his performance as a shinobi is pretty important and we regrettably can't afford any unnecessary damage to his oh so fragile person." She tapped her foot impatiently. "In short, don't do it again." With a final warning look, she strutted past Sakura.

The swinging of the door gave way to silence. Kakashi closed his eyes, too tired to instigate any interaction. He heard footsteps as Sakura approached him and the scraping of wood on tile as she pulled up a chair on his left.

"So… how are you?"

Kakashi cracked an eye open to glare at her. To match her annoyingly peppy voice, she was sticking her tongue out playfully at him.

"Mmrmff." Sakura only giggled at his less than enthusiastic response.

"Well, at least now you know how to treat me with respect," she said, her innocent grin melting into a dark smirk. Now that Tsunade was gone, it seemed she had lost any pretense of feeling remorse over her actions.

Kakashi snorted incredulously.

"Respect?" he muttered, squinting angrily at his daughter. "What about respect for your parents? Isn't it a rule somewhere?"

Sakura wrinkled her nose in disgust.

"No!" she said defiantly. "Of course not."

Kakashi frowned. "Oh." He paused. "Well, regardless, you don't think you might have overreacted?"

For a moment, it appeared that Sakura was actually seriously considering this suggestion. She tapped her chin thoughtfully, tilting her head and looking at the ceiling. With a snap of her fingers her gaze returned to him, a smile again plastered onto her face.

"Nope!" she said cheerfully. Kakashi scowled and turned his head away from her; it was about the biggest act of defiance he could perform. Sakura laughed at him, saying something about childishness. Kakashi deigned not to respond.

A loud yawn escaped Sakura as she stretched, rubbing her eyes. "Your room is kinda boring," she said, looking around. She sighed as she noticed the bare endtable. "Not even any flowers, huh?"

"Flowers?" Kakashi contemplated this. He hadn't had flowers in his hospital room since he was fifteen. "Hmm… no, I don't like them much." His tone was light and carried no hints of the underlying pang of sadness.

"Not like flowers?" Sakura scoffed. "Don't be silly. Everyone likes flowers." She crossed her arms and fixed the back of his head with a hard stare. He felt her gaze but didn't respond, letting his mind wander. After a long silence, she put her foot against his bed and leaned back in her chair.

"You're terrible," she concluded.

Kakashi smiled into his blanket. "I try," he said dryly.

Sakura wrinkled her nose again but said nothing; the door clicking open interrupted their banter.

"Hey Sakura! Hey Sensei!" Kakashi groaned as Sakura lit up; both of them immediately recognized that loud voice.

"Naruto!" Sakura exclaimed, the legs of her chair meeting the floor with a thud. She straightened up, beaming. "Hi!"

Naruto grinned goofily as he walked over. "I heard Kakashi-sensei was in the hospital and so I decided to drop by and say hello!" As he spotted the bedridden Kakashi, however, he scrunched his face up in confusion. "Why are you in the hospital, anyway?"

More muttering escaped Kakashi as Sakura smiled sheepishly. Naruto looked between the two of them, struggling to put two and two together.

"Ne… You didn't do this to him, did you, Sakura-chan?" His voice was small and his eyes were wide. Sakura nodded and Naruto's mouth shrunk into a tiny "oh". Beads of sweat ran down his face.

"Eh… I see…" He gulped, tugging at the collar of his jumpsuit. "Er… why?" It was more of a frightened squeak than an actual question.

Sakura's grin was priceless.

"He flipped me off."

Naruto stood frozen, gaping silently. He was sweating profusely now and looking nervously between Kakashi's still figure and Sakura's smiling face. On numerous occasions he had come dangerously close to giving Sakura the bird. He was now thanking the heavens he had always reconsidered.

"Oh… Ha… ha…" he laughed shakily, rubbing the back of his neck. _How can someone so pretty be so dangerous…?_

Sakura continued to shine her smile at him. "I know, it's funny how carried away I can get sometimes." Her tinkling laugh sent shivers down Naruto's spine. Inside, Sakura rejoiced at his fright. _Heh,__ Naruto's so easy to scare. _She watched the sweat roll down his tanned cheeks, following the trail of the moisture as it changed direction and speed to match the curves of his face._ Come to think of it, he looks kinda cute when he's nervous…_

She blinked the thought away and looked instead at the clock above his head. Her eyes got wide as she realized the time.

"Damn!" She jumped to her feet. Both Naruto and Kakashi looked at her with surprise.

"What's wrong?" Naruto asked.

"I'm late!" She adjusted the straps of her boots hurriedly, fumbling with the fastenings.

"For what?"

"I have to give Shizune a report on some medical research," she explained, grabbing some papers she had set down. "I was supposed to meet her fifteen minutes ago but it slipped my mind because I was coming here…" She shuffled through her papers, her desperation apparent.

"Nn, I'm sure Shizune will understand," Kakashi reassured her, peeking out over his blanket.

"Tch, she's been really moody lately," Sakura said, sliding the papers into an envelope and stuffing it into her bag. "Anyway, I have to go! Bye!" She waved and bounded out of the room.

Naruto seemed to deflate as she left. "Eh… well… I have to go too, then," he said. He looked over at Kakashi only to be met with a skeptically raised eyebrow.

"Convenient timing," Kakashi commented.

Naruto scrunched his face up again. "What?"

"Nothing," Kakashi said. "Just go and do… whatever it is you do, I guess."

Naruto snickered.

"Now that I think of it," he said, "this is pretty funny… You getting beaten up by Sakura and all…"

Kakashi flashed him a warning glare and Naruto twitched, watching the tomoe in his sensei's Sharingan swirl menacingly.

"All right! I'm out, I'm out!" He scampered out of the room and in the space of a few seconds Kakashi couldn't even sense his chakra anymore.

Satisfied, Kakashi relaxed. He did his best to settle in his bed, hoping to fall asleep before the pain medication started wearing off. He could already feel its effects ebbing away, but it wasn't that hard to pass into unconsciousness. After all, compared to the noise Naruto and Sakura had made, the beeping didn't seem that bad.

(…)

"Damn!"

Kurenai stopped and steadied herself against a wall, breathing in and out slowly. A hand immediately flew to her stomach as she fingered her belly softly, trying to soothe the kicking baby within. "Dammit," she growled through gritted teeth, bracing herself against the pain. "Would you calm down already?" A passing man gave her an odd look, but the venomous glare she shot him in return sent him hobbling down the street, muttering something about hormones.

After the kicking had subsided, Kurenai started walking again. She tried her best to appreciate the warm and sunny weather, but it wasn't enough to distract her from all the happy people walking by. They seemed to follow her, haunting her every step like a shadow; arms locked and stepping in sync, lovers seemed to be everywhere. It was strange; when Asuma had been around, she had thought there was a strange lack of romantic activity on the streets of Konoha. At first she had felt conspicuous, walking down the streets hand in hand with Asuma, but now she felt like she stood out for being alone. The bulge in her belly wasn't helping matters.

"Men," she muttered spitefully. Something squirmed in her lower abdomen. "I know," she assured the baby. "They have terrible timing." She patted her belly consolingly.

She froze, suddenly conscious of what she was doing. Her arms dropped to her sides. _Oh, look at me, _she sighed. _I'm talking to someone who can't even hear me…_ Slumping her shoulders, she started walking again. So focused was she on her depressing state that she almost didn't hear someone calling out to her.

"Kurenai!" Someone shouted. "Hey, Kurenai!"

Snapping back into reality, Kurenai stopped. She turned her head towards the source of the voice, raising an eyebrow in surprise.

"Shizune?" She faced the approaching woman fully, crossing her arms in surprise.

"Hi," Shizune said, waving. She wiped a bead of sweat from her forehead. "I saw you walking, and I… I was worried about—"

Kurenai dismissed her with a wave of the hand.

"You're always worried, Shizune," she said, putting a hand on her hip. Shizune noticed the sunlight glinting off of the ring on Kurenai's finger. Her spacey smile was replaced by a small frown. She straightened, looking up into her friend's face. There were deep circles under Kurenai's eyes, which were outlined by red and puffy skin. Her face was pale and framed by a frizzy mess of black hair.

"I have every right to be," she said. She folded her arms across her chest and leaned forward, balancing on the balls of her feet. "Have you been eating okay, Kurenai? You don't look well, and you have to be extra careful because of the baby."

Kurenai sighed. "I've been eating fine, Shizune," she assured her, shaking her head. "I'm just tired, that's all." She allowed herself a small chuckle. "You would be too if you were pregnant."

A blush rose in Shizune's face. Her eyes darted nervously from side to side before she squeezed them shut, hunching her shoulders. Kurenai gasped.

"Shizune, you're not—?"

Shizune nodded hastily. Almost immediately, she found herself wrapped in the arms of her friend.

"That's fantastic, Shizune!" she exclaimed. She rocked back and forth a little before releasing her friend. Beaming, she stepped back, holding onto both of Shizune's hands. A little bemused, Shizune smiled back.

"I'm pretty excited," she admitted. Kurenai laughed, swinging their arms a little. "Of course you are!" Shizune giggled sheepishly.

"Say…" Kurenai whispered, looking around as if checking for eavesdroppers. "It is Genma's, right?"

Shizune blushed furiously. "Of course it is!" she whispered, scandalized. "I don't sleep around!" She turned her nose up at the thought.

"I know you don't," Kurenai said, sticking her tongue out. She let their hands drop and yawned.

"Well, we should definitely get together later," she said. "Then we can talk all about this!"

Shizune blinked, looking a little confused.

"Where are you going now?" she asked.

"I have to visit someone in the hospital," Kurenai explained hurriedly. "But don't worry, it's just a quick visit and when I'm done, I'm coming straight over to your place!"

Shizune laughed nervously. "I don't know if that's such a good idea… er…"

"Why not?"

"Um… well… Genma's not in the best condition right now, you see… he's a little…"

"Shaken up?" Kurenai finished for her, ending with a small laugh. "Asuma was the same way." Her excited expression gave way to a fond smile. She looked as if she were staring off into some faraway land beyond her reach as she said quietly, "He was so excited, though. He couldn't believe we had actually made a baby."

Uncomfortable with the silence that followed and starting to feel sick to the stomach again, Shizune gave Kurenai another hug. "I'll calm Genma down if he hasn't gone out already," she said, and it seemed like she was trying to reassure herself more than Kurenai. "Knowing him, though, he's probably gone off drinking." She was relieved to see that Kurenai laughed along with her, although it was a little shaky. "You hang in there, okay?"

Kurenai nodded distractedly. "Mm-hm," she said. "I'll see you in a couple of minutes!" She waved as Shizune hurried out of sight. Her hand remained half-heartedly raised into the air as she watched her friend scurry home, eager to share the confirmed news with her boyfriend.

Memories of Kurenai's own life-changing visit to the hospital surfaced in her mind. She remembered throwing up all over Asuma's couch and mumbling apologetically as Asuma scrubbed it up, simultaneously cursing and forgiving her. _"Dammit, Kurenai, it's kind of a bitchy thing to do but it's not your fault, I guess… Maybe you should go to the hospital?"_ Go to the hospital she had, although _he_ preferred to visit Kakashi rather than sit with her and find out what was wrong. _"I thought it was a woman thing, you know? And besides, I needed a man to talk to." _Kurenai found it slightly ironic that now she was going to visit Kakashi when she had thought it such an insensitive thing for Asuma to do. _At least I'm not bringing my entire team, _she reminded herself, remembering how Asuma had felt it necessary to drag the whole ensemble around whenever he needed moral support.

Kurenai sighed, rubbing at her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she bent her knees and squatted, picking a flower off of the side of the road. She straightened up and exhaled slowly, stroking the petals of the daisy she had claimed.

"You're cute, aren't you?" she said, observing it. "Innocent, too." She squinted and looked ahead of her, staking out the hospital. She was only a street or two away.

"All right, you ready?" She patted her belly encouragingly and kept walking.

(…)

The hospital was mostly deserted at this time of day. Afternoons were never lazy for the staff because there were always people who needed assistance, but even a medical ninja couldn't even entertain the idea of being busy when the clouds were so fluffy and the sky was so blue. There also weren't many visitors, and so Kurenai found herself almost completely alone as she walked through the eerily sterile hallways.

Counting the room numbers under her breath, she stopped outside Kakashi's door. She flattened her hair, wondering dimly how long it had been since she had even seen a comb. Shrugging the notion off, she pushed open the door.

Kakashi was, unsurprisingly, asleep. If he had been awake, it was fairly certain that he would already be trying to slip out the window, broken bones or not. He had never been one for hospitals, Kurenai remembered, and she could quite clearly recall some of the wilder stories Asuma had told her about Kakashi's "escape missions", as he called them. Kakashi had denied most of these had ever happened, but even he couldn't hide his smirk.

Slowly, Kurenai walked towards the bed. She was glad this hadn't been the room he was in when Asuma had visited before… Well, Kurenai didn't like to think about it. All that mattered was that this wasn't it. She folded her arms across her chest, observing Kakashi carefully. It wasn't that often that she got the chance to see him sleep; whenever she encountered him, he was usually slouching with his nose in that smut of his. Now, while the blanket was still covering most of his face, he seemed less to be hiding and more to be… Kurenai couldn't put her finger on it. After some careful observation, however, she decided that she liked him better this way.

Her eyes wandered to the endtable beside his bed, bare but for an empty vase. She was all of a sudden very aware of the flower she was holding loosely. Tilting her head to the side, she considered putting the flower in the vase and its possible repercussions. Sure, she thought, it seemed like a nice gesture and all, but if it were to be misconstrued…

Kurenai shook her head. She leaned forward and dropped the daisy in the vase. It slid a little, the face drooping down over the side. With a little tap, though, it was beautiful as it could have been in the ground. After pouring a little water in the vase to keep the flower fresh, Kurenai stepped back to admire her work. She figured that it would be a pleasant surprise for Kakashi when he woke up. After all, Kakashi never got flowers. Not anymore.

She turned and started to leave, catching herself in the doorway and looking back. It was calming to see Kakashi lying there, breathing slowly and accompanied by a single daisy. It seemed right, somehow. Kurenai smiled and left, closing the door quietly behind her.

Sometimes it was best not to over-think things.


End file.
